高中英語讀后續寫常見問題及對策

一、引言

隨著教育改革的推進，高中英語讀后續寫逐漸成為提升學生閱讀理解和寫作能力的重要手段，是高中英語考查的一項重要內容，旨在通過閱讀理解文本并續寫內容，培養學生的語言運用能力和創新思維。然而，在實際教學中，筆者發現考生在續寫時，常常會出現結尾不當、銜接不當、語言表達欠精準、情感刻畫不夠深入等問題，走入了某些誤區，導致讀后續寫學習效果不佳。因此，本文將結合平常的教學實踐，針對以上幾個問題進行探討，并提出相應的解決策略，以幫助提高考生讀后續寫的寫作能力。

二、高中英語讀后續寫常見問題

1.結尾不當

在續寫過程中，考生往往因時間不足，對原文大多只是匆匆看幾眼，便就開始構思續寫。 對原文內容囫圇吞棗，一知半解，錯過了原文的關鍵信息和伏筆，未能準確把握文章的主題。有時則因為文中某句話或自己的生活經驗，主觀臆斷，妄加揣測，曲解了文章的主題思想，導致結尾部分與文章整體主題偏離。

2.銜接不當

銜接語段是指在文章中起到連接作用的語言，可以讓讀者更好地理解上下文之間的聯系，增強文章的整體連貫性和流暢性。讀后續寫的銜接主要包括：續寫內容要與全文內容銜接、連貫自然；續寫第一段最后一句與第二段第一句的自然銜接。考生銜接問題往往出現在續寫第一段最后一句與第二段第一句之間，導致情節斷裂或邏輯不清。

3.語言表達欠精準

考生在寫作中的存在語言表達不準確的現象，如單詞拼寫錯誤、詞性錯用、使用中式思維句子、 句子結構混亂等。此外，還表現在用詞不夠精確，表達含糊和句式單一等方面，因而影響文章的表達效果和可讀性。

4.情感刻畫不夠深入

對于人物情感描寫，考生往往傾向于直接抒情，形式單一，一步到位，沒有體現出層次變化，沒有過渡或對比和襯托，因而未能精準傳遞原文作者想要賦予的人物情感或想要刻畫的人物形象，致使故事未能達到預設的情感深度和感染力。

三、對策

1.明確主題

在續寫前，考生應認真閱讀原文，借助文章的標題、每段的首句以及多次重復出現的語句等，去理清故事的中心思想和寓意，抓住作者的寫作意圖，即弄清作者想借助這個故事向讀者傳遞什么樣的思想情感或揭示什么樣的人生哲理。在續寫的過程中始終圍繞著文章主題進行思考和創作，確保結尾部分與文章整體主題一致。如：

［例1］原文講述了“ 作者的未成年的兒子抱怨作者不讓他晚上外出，不滿嚴格管教的兒子在夜里偷偷把家里收留的流浪貓放了出去，貓差點被凍死…”的故事。原文部分關鍵語句如下：

My teenage son， Jordan， always complained about having to be home earlier than all his friends. He would tell me that he was already seventeen， but still had a curfew （宵禁）. He believed he was practically an adult. I pointed out that he was not an adult as he was still in high school.

“You dont trust me！” he yelled. …. How could I make Jordan see that I only wanted to keep him safe？

… I opened the front door and nearly stepped on her： a small black cat， just like a meatball. …Meatball seemed happy enough to come in the house， but after an hour or two， she sat by the door， meowing to go back outside.

“Why wont she just stay in with us all the time？” Nathan， my youngest son asked.

I explained to him that she was happy here but she liked being able to come and go as she pleased. …

Meatball became a regular. One night， temperatures were unusually low. Meatball stood at the door， meowing to go outside.

I shook my head at her， afraid that she might freeze to death. She stared at me and meowed again. I patted her head， “I know youre not happy， but its for your own good.”

“Moms not being mean to you，” Nathan told the cat. “Shes just trying to keep you from turning into a frozen meatball.”…

P1.The next morning， I couldnt find Meatball. I asked the kids if anyone had seen her.

P2. As I drove to the animal hospital， Jordan sat in the back， holding Meatball inside his coat.

從原文幾個關鍵信息句（劃線部分）和續寫第二段的首句——兒子把凍傷的貓一直抱在自己的外套里，生怕它死去，可知兒子在為他之前的行為感到懊悔，可以推斷出整個故事的走向和結局是“兒子通過貓差點被凍死這件事，明白作者不讓他出去是為了他的安全著想這一道理。故事的主題很明確，作者想向讀者傳達“父母對孩子的嚴格管教都是為了孩子好，孩子應當理解父母管教的用心良苦和予以配合”這一道理。

但部分考生只憑文章中“I explained to him that she was happy here but she liked being able to come and go as she pleased.” 這句話以及自己的主觀臆斷，判定媽媽都會包容孩子的錯誤，所以續寫部分的結尾變成了“兒子向媽媽認錯后，媽媽原諒了兒子，最終媽媽做出了讓步，決定放寬對兒子的管教。”明顯偏離了原文的主題。

問題示例：

As I drove to the animal hospital， Jordan sat in the back， holding Meatball inside his coat. I worried about Meatballs condition. We two kept silent until， surprisingly， Jordan took the first step and apologized to me for what he had done to Meatball and me. He said that he would keep the rule and wouldnt go out at night alone. Listening to what he said， I suddenly realized that I might be wrong. I was too strict with him. He was also an independent individual， and he had the rights to get his freedom， so I promised I would soften the rule for him. After all， a child must grow up， and we parents could not be his harbor for ever.

正確示例：

As I drove to the animal hospital， Jordan sat in the back， holding Meatball inside his coat. I could hear him talking to the cat， apologizing repeatedly. Luckily， the vet saved Meatball. Seeing her eyes open， Jordan stroked her head， all tears. Then， surprisingly， he turned to me. He apologized for what he had done. “I know you just want to keep me safe，” he murmured. I felt a lump in my throat. He rubbed Meatballs back， “Looks like we are both going to observe the curfew. Its for our own good.”

2.理清情節

考生應仔細閱讀原文，理解故事背景、情節發展、人物性格以及主題思想。注意原文中的細節及線索，思考原文的伏筆和暗示，為續寫內容提供合理的邏輯依據，以保持與原文情節緊密相連，銜接自然合理。理清文章的主線后，劃出續寫第二段首句關鍵詞，運用逆向思維推斷續寫第一段的情節及本段最后一句的內容，使之與第二段首句自然銜接。如：

［例2］原文講述了“ 作者的未成年的兒子抱怨作者不讓他晚上外出，不滿嚴格管教的兒子在夜里偷偷把家里的收留的流浪貓放了出去，貓差點被凍死…”的故事。原文給定的兩段續寫首句分別為：P1.The next morning， I couldnt find Meatball. I asked the kids if anyone had seen her.

P2. As I drove to the animal hospital， Jordan sat in the back， holding Meatball inside his coat.

續寫第二段首句提到的“As I drove to the animal hospital， Jordan sat in the back， holding Meatball inside his coat. ”，運用逆向思維可以推斷：P1 的續寫內容應當包括“去找貓—發現貓—發現貓狀態不對——需要把貓送到醫院救治”。同時由于P2首句已經提到 “作者驅車去醫院的路上，兒子Jordan抱著小貓坐在車后座”， 所以，續寫第一段末句不應該寫到“貓已經在醫院救治”或“貓已經死了”這樣的情節。

問題示例：P1…I searched every corner round like crazy for Meatballs trace， but she was nowhere to be found. I was about to give up when my phone rang. It was Jordan. He rang to tell that he had found Meatball and ask me to go to the hospital to help.

正確示例：P1….Several minutes later， the poor thing was found， shaking and curling into a tiny ball. I picked her up， unsure whether she was alive or dead. Jordan was scared， “We need a vet！ Now！” 或We then rushed Meatball towards the nearest animal hospital.

3. 模仿創作

考生平時應多積累“名場面”描寫的豐富語言，并根據給定場景及提示進行片段的微寫作訓練。同時，在平常的作文評講及訓練課上，還可以根據老師提供的示例，積極模仿，并對自己的文章進行二次創作。例如，老師挑選出某個精彩的場景或片段描寫，考生找出其中所使用的豐富表達形式，如分詞作狀語、with 復合結構、倒裝句、省略句、各類從句、無靈主語句以及其它固定句式等，并模仿著去修改潤色自己的文章，以小組合作的形式開展效果更佳。

［例3］場景微寫作訓練

提示： 第一次登臺比賽，緊張，但自我調整后，逐漸進入狀態，努力付出得到回報和肯定，因而倍受鼓舞。

開頭：When it was finally my turn， I could feel my heart pounding fiercely inside.

續寫：Though I had been practicing hard for the competition， I was not yet mentally-prepared. To ease my fear， I took a deep breath， and then all of a sudden， Miss Smiths encouraging voice came into my mind. I began to focus on my breath， move and pace. As I finished the last move， thunderous applause and cheers burst out from the audience. The moment I bowed to the audience， I couldnt contain my tears any more.Looking back， countless days and nights had witnessed my unremitting efforts， and they finally paid off. And that would be an everlasting source of inspiration to push me ahead.

［例4］二次創作訓練

原文講述了“女孩家里很窮，爸爸生病，媽媽一直吃苦耐勞，盡最大能力保證一家老小的生活。快過年了，女孩本打算用自己平常偷偷做兼職所掙的錢給自己買一雙皮手套，最后卻改變了主意…”的故事。原文給出的兩段首句分別為： P1. The bus drove off without me. 和 P2.When Mum opened the door， she surprisingly found that some of the groceries fell inside onto the floor. 明顯，第一段應該寫我放棄買手套，為家里購置年貨的心理活動和過程。

場景1：車開走后，我決定放棄手套，轉而準備為家里購置年貨。

初次習作：The bus drove off without me. I decided to go to the nearby grocery store to buy the things my family needed for the coming New Year.

模仿后創作：The bus drove off without me. Seeing the black smoke left behind， I felt a strong sense of relief， as gone with the bus was also my desire to buy myself a pair of gloves. Minutes later， I found myself in a grocery story just across the stop. （本句共用了3種高級句式：分詞做狀語； 倒裝句 和“find+sb.+賓補”表達“不知不覺地，下意識地”之意。）

場景2：我為家里買年貨的過程和心理活動。

初次習作：I directly went into the nearby store. In the store I chose some lights， decorations and food for the New Year rather than a pair of gloves for myself. After that， I eagerly headed towards home.

模仿后創作：I directly went into the nearby store. Looking at all that various kinds of items on the shelves， I was， for a few seconds， at a loss what to buy with such limited money. But soon I knew very clearly that I should first get some food and goodies for the New Year dinner and then get some lights and decorations， if possible， for the festive atmosphere. When I spent the last penny of my hard-earned dollars， a great sense of pride welled up inside me. I just couldnt stop imaging how happy my mom would be when she saw all these. （本句共用了4種高級句式： 分詞做狀語； “特殊疑問詞+to do”作賓語；省略句 和“couldnt stop doing” 表達“情不自禁”之意。）

場景3：我把年貨帶回家，放到門口。

初次習作： Soon I stopped outside my home. With hands full of groceries， I gently knocked at the door.

模仿后創作：Soon I stopped outside my home. To give mom a surprise I put/placed the groceries against the door， knocked at it and quickly "hid myself away. （本句使用動作鏈，畫面感更強。）

4.多維度描寫

考生除了要關注原文與情感相關的形容詞、副詞、名詞、動詞和介詞短語外，還要運用“To show， not to tell ”的方法，即通過多個維度觀察，如人物的面部表情、肢體動作、心理活動 、人物語言、聲音、周圍環境等體會和描繪出原文作者想要賦予的人物情感。哭喪或微笑的臉、堅定的眼神等傳達了人物的喜怒哀懼；歡快的場景表現出人物愉悅的心情；壓抑寒冷的天氣描寫則襯托了人物的悲傷。增加具體、生動的細節，從側面反映出人物情感和個性，而非空洞或籠統的敘述。

同時，故事人物情感變化和發展應遵守循序漸進的規律，要體現出深淺變化的層次，同一種感情會因為不同的誘因而有不同的表露形式和強度，在描寫的時候都應該有所區別。這樣才能使得人物情感更加豐富細膩，精準到位，人物性格更加鮮明突出，因而更能給讀者帶來沉浸式的閱讀體驗。

［例5］

（1）He is a happy man. 他是一個快樂的人。

（2）He is always wearing a bright smile. Whenever it is and wherever he is， with his great sense of humor and enthusiasm， he never fails to have "giggles lingering around. 他的臉上總是洋溢著笑容，無論何時何地，他都能用他的幽默和樂觀讓周圍的人笑聲不斷。

（通過展示“面部表情”——“臉上總是洋溢著笑容”和“聲音”——“周圍笑聲不斷”等細節，讀者能夠更直接地感受到這個人物的快樂性格，這比簡單的陳述要生動得多。）

［例6］

（1）Tom was very angry. 湯姆很生氣。

（2）“Toms face was flushed with anger as he "glared at the broken toy on the floor. ‘How could you do this？’he shouted angrily， pointing at his younger brother. ‘You know how much this means to me！’ His" fists were clenched tightly， and his voice was filled with indignation and dissatisfaction.”湯姆怒視著地上的破玩具，氣得臉都紅了。“你怎么能這么做？”他指著弟弟生氣地喊道。“你知道這對我有多重要！”他的拳頭攥得緊緊的，聲音里充滿了憤慨和不滿。

（通過展示“肢體動作”—— “glare at， shout，point at， clench fists ”及語言 使得人物情緒躍然于紙上。）

［例7］

（1）Brandon was very sad. 布蘭登很傷心

（2）The dimly lit room， with its quiet and mournful atmosphere， deepened Brandons sorrow.

燈光昏暗的房間，安靜而悲傷的氣氛，加深了布蘭登的悲傷。

（通過展示“周圍環境和氛圍”——“燈光昏暗的房間，安靜而悲傷的氣氛”直觀地烘托出人物的情緒狀態。）

［例8］上臺做演講時的緊張

When it was finally my turn， I summoned up my courage and stumped toward the stage.The moment I managed onto the stage， I couldnt help looking at the crowd. With so many eyes fixed on me， I got even more nervous. I cleared my voice and tried to begin the speech， but only to find my mind went blank and nothing came out of my throat.

［例9］一個人獨自在野外走夜路，突然聽見一陣哭聲時的緊張

Holding his breath， Tom could feel his heart beating wildly.He couldnt help clutching his fists as if to defend.Gathering his courage， he took one more step forward. To his relief， the cry disappeared.Tom looked around and found nobody， but his own shadow cast on the thick woods， with his sweating palms and forehead. （緊張中伴隨著害怕，所以強度更高。）

四、結語

總之，針對以上讀后續寫中出現的問題，考生應當細讀原文，明確主題，理清情節，平常要多積累，勤模仿，勇創新。只要我們采取有效的對策，并持之以恒，定能克服這些困境和挑戰，那么提高讀后續寫的寫作水平便指日可待。

【本文系“中小學英語教學研究專項課題：基于深度閱讀的高中英語寫作任務活動的設計與實施研究（批準號：GDJY-2022-A-yyb84）以及廣東省教育科學研究項目重點課題：高中英語閱讀教學中學科能力培養的行動研究（批準號：2023ZQJK119）”系列研究成果】

【作者簡介：中學一級教師，工作期間多次獲得優秀班主任，教學積極分子，教研教改積極分子，年度優秀工作者等榮譽稱號；參加廣東省新課程與信息技術整合優秀主題資源、教學設計及錄像課例評選活動榮獲二等獎；參與教育部基礎教育課程教材發展中心“基礎教育高中英語教學評價試驗項目”的研究與試驗工作；撰寫的課題論文《英語閱讀課堂評價的剖析與反思》獲課題優秀學術研究成果評選三等獎；《學生相互評價在高中英語寫作教學中的運用》獲課題優秀學術研究成果評選一等獎】

責任編輯 吳昊雷