How to Combat Loneliness in the Workplace如何對抗職場孤獨感

Twice each month， executives at the dating app company Hinge gather for a team meeting. But rather than dive into discussions about metrics or revenue， they begin by simply talking.

約會應用程序“鉸鏈”公司的高管們每月舉行兩次團隊會議。但他們并不會一開始就深入探討業績指標或收益情況，而是先進行簡單的交流。

For the first 30 minutes of the two-hour meeting， these coworkers reveal hopes and anxieties—what they worry about， what they’re grateful for， what they’re feeling. Even at a company focused on connecting people， forging real relationships in the workplace takes effort， Hinge CEO Justin McLeod told an audience at the South by Southwest Conference1. He was co-presenting at the event with Ann Shoket， whose initiative to combat workplace loneliness is called “10 Minutes to Togetherness.”

在時長兩小時的會議的前30分鐘，這些同事會分享自己的希望與焦慮，比如他們擔心的事情、感激的事情以及當下的感受。“鉸鏈”的首席執行官賈斯廷·麥克勞德在西南偏南大會上向一位觀眾表示，即便在一家專注于人際連接的公司，在職場建立真實的關系也并非易事。他與安·肖克特共同出席了該活動，安發起了一項名為“十分鐘心意聯通”的倡議，旨在對抗職場孤獨感。

As America navigates what Surgeon General Vivek Murthy described last year as a loneliness epidemic， employers and employees across the country are trying to address what for many people is a lack of real friendships at work.

去年，美國醫務總監維韋克·穆爾蒂稱美國正在經歷一種“孤獨流行病”，全國各地的雇主和員工都在努力解決許多人在工作中缺乏真正友誼的問題。

Remote meetings of “little heads in squares”

“方框里的小腦袋”的遠程會議

The problem of loneliness has been bubbling for decades; Robert D. Putnam documented it in his groundbreaking book “Bowling Alone” nearly a quarter-century ago. Remote work has only intensified the problem， for extroverts and introverts alike， says leadership expert Michael Bungay Stanier， author of “How to Work with （Almost） Anyone.”

孤獨問題已經持續醞釀了幾十年；大約在25年前，羅伯特·D. 帕特南在其開創性著作《獨自打保齡》中就提到了這一點。領導力專家、《如何與（幾乎）所有人共事》的作者邁克爾·邦蓋·斯塔尼爾表示，遠程工作只會加劇這個問題，對內向者和外向者都是如此。

“People have this desire to be seen and be heard，” Bungay Stanier says， but on video calls， the group gets right to the business at hand rather than having the natural， informal interactions of a real room. It reduces people to “little heads in squares.”

“人們渴望被看見、被傾聽?！卑钌w·斯塔尼爾說，但在視頻通話中，團隊會直接進入正題，而不是像在真實房間里那樣進行自然、非正式的互動。這把人簡化成了“方框里的小腦袋”。

It’s not easy to talk about this lack of friendship at work “because it feels like a shameful confession，” Bungay Stanier says. But his clients are beginning to bring up the subject.

談論工作中缺乏友誼的問題并不容易，“因為這說出來感覺很丟人?！卑钌w·斯塔尼爾說。但他的客戶已經開始提出這個話題。

Awkward as it may be， these are conversations worth having， according to psychology professor Laurie Santos， creator of Yale University’s well-known class “The Science of Well Being.”

耶魯大學著名課程“幸福的科學”創始人、心理學教授勞麗·桑托斯認為，盡管可能有些尷尬，但這些對話值得進行。

At-work friendships are good for employers， too

職場友誼對雇主也有益

In her own presentation at South by Southwest， Santos cited research that showed workplace friendships and a sense of belonging are vital to employees’ happiness—and companies’ success.

桑托斯在西南偏南大會上發表演講時引用了一些研究結果指出，職場友誼和歸屬感對員工的幸福感以及公司的成功至關重要。

We assume that friendships at work are “a nice-to-have， not a need-to-have，” she said.

她說，我們通常認為職場友誼“有固然好，但非必需”。

But “maybe one of the reasons we’re all so disengaged at work， maybe one of the reasons ‘quiet quitting’ seems so appealing， is that we’re actively not investing in the thing that might matter the most for our happiness at work， which is our connection with other people，” Santos said.

但桑托斯還提到，“或許我們在工作中如此消極怠工、‘在職躺平’看起來如此誘人的原因之一，是我們沒有積極投入到對職場幸福感最重要的事情上，那就是我們與他人的聯系”。

New spaces， new programs and “casual collisions”

新空間、新項目與“偶遇”

Some large companies began paying more attention to employee health long before the pandemic， often focusing on the physical： adding a gym to the office building or serving healthier food in the cafeteria.

早在疫情之前，一些大公司就開始更加關注員工健康，通常聚焦于身體健康方面，比如在辦公樓里增設健身房，或者在食堂提供更健康的食物。

Today， more employers “are not just checking boxes， but actually looking at ways to really enhance people’s health and well-being，” says Suzanne Heidelberger， who has led teams managing real-estate properties for global companies including American Express and Fidelity Investments. She focuses on bringing a hospitality mindset to corporate spaces.

曾帶領團隊為美國運通和富達投資等全球公司管理房地產的蘇珊娜·海德爾伯格表示，如今，越來越多的雇主“不只是敷衍了事，而是真正想辦法切實提升員工的健康和幸?！?。她致力于將熱情好客的心態融入公司空間。

For example， employers might：

例如，雇主們可以：

Rethink physical spaces with relationships in mind. Some companies are adding staircases， both to help people get more steps and to encourage the “casual collisions” that can lead to good relationships. Some are trying to transform green rooftops—created to be environmentally friendly—into gathering spaces.

從人際關系的角度出發重新規劃物理空間。一些公司增設樓梯，既讓人們多活動，又能促進可能帶來良好關系的“偶遇”。還有一些公司嘗試把為環保而建的綠色屋頂改造成聚會場所。

Create groups and events to help employees find friends who share their interests. “It could even be something goofy， like an ice cream social for dog lovers， where we’re going to teach you how to make healthy ice cream for your dog，” Heidelberger says.

創建小組、組織活動，幫助員工找到志同道合的朋友。海德爾伯格說：“活動甚至可以是幼稚可笑的，比如為愛狗人士舉辦冰淇淋聯誼會，教大家如何為狗狗制作健康的冰淇淋?！?/p>

Offer online gatherings as well. During the pandemic， American Express offered online cooking classes that helped employees feel connected and introduced them to coworkers.

同時提供線上聚會。疫情期間，美國運通推出線上烹飪課程，這讓員工們有了親近感，還幫助他們結識了同事。

What employees can do

員工可以采取的行動

Employees are also seeking answers on their own， notes executive coach Daniel Boscaljon， founder of the Healthy Relationship Academy， which helps organizations build better workplaces.

身為高管教練的丹尼爾·博斯卡爾永是健康關系學院的創始人，該學院致力于幫助機構打造更好的工作環境。他指出，員工們也在自己尋找解決辦法。

It’s not always easy： As much as people crave relationships， he says， many lack strong interpersonal skills.

他說，這并非易事，因為盡管人們渴望建立友好關系，但許多人缺乏較強的人際交往能力。

“When you meet somebody with good relationship skills， a lot of times it’s like magic，” Boscaljon says. “People open up， they’ll start to talk， they’ll feel comfortable. Then， sometimes， they’ll have kind of a ‘vulnerability hangover，’ where they’re like， ‘I was too open there. What just happened？’ … People are so unused to it.”

博斯卡爾永說：“當你遇到一個人際交往能力很強的人時，很多時候就像有魔法一樣。人們會敞開心扉，開始交談，感覺很自在。但有時，他們會有‘脆弱后遺癥’，心中會想，‘我剛剛太敞開心扉了，發生了什么？’……人們對此太不習慣了。”

One key， he says， is to work on one’s own well-being. “You can’t have a work personality and a home personality，” he says. “Who you are as a whole person shows up in every place that you’re in.”

他認為，關鍵之一是關注自身的身心狀況?！澳悴豢赡芡瑫r擁有工作人格和居家人格?！彼f，“作為一個完整的人，你完整的人格特質會在你所處的每個地方展現出來?！?/p>

Another strategy， according to Bungay Stanier， is to communicate with coworkers about how you can best work together before you dive into a project.

邦蓋·斯塔尼爾提出，另一個策略是在開始一個項目前，與同事溝通如何才能更好地合作。

“We’ve all got our small little habits and preferences，” he says. “And we assume what’s normal for us is normal for everyone.”

他說：“我們都有自己的小習慣和偏好，而且我們常常認為自己覺得正常的事情對每個人來說都是正常的?！?/p>

Raising issues beforehand helps you “avoid making small rips in the fabric of a relationship” that keep people from becoming friends， Bungay Stanier says.

提前提出這些問題有助于“避免給雙方之間的關系造成小裂痕”，這些裂痕會阻礙人們成為朋友，邦蓋·斯塔尼爾說道。

Those inevitable rips are also worth discussing. “The relationships that thrive are ones that get repaired，” he says.

那些不可避免的關系裂痕也值得討論。他還說，“能夠蓬勃發展的關系都是得到修復的關系”。

Say hi

打個招呼

More than anything， remember the importance of everyday greetings at work—even if they make you a bit uncomfortable. A simple hello， Bungay Stanier says， could be the beginning of the end of loneliness.

最重要的是，要記住職場日常打招呼的重要性——即便這會讓你有點不自在。邦蓋·斯塔尼爾說，簡單的一句“你好”，可能就是終結孤獨的開始。

（譯者為“《英語世界》杯”翻譯大賽獲獎者）

1 西南偏南大會，是每年在美國德克薩斯州舉行的一系列電影、交互式多媒體和音樂的藝術節與大會，目前已經成為世界上最大規模的“音樂+電影+科技”盛會。