《大話西游》精彩雙語對白

Kwan-yin：Monkey King， you bastard. You’ve promised Buddha to help the Longevity Monk to get scriptures in the west. But the King Bull andyou decided to eat your master. Do you know you’ve made a real big mistake?

觀音：孫悟空，你這個畜牲。你本來答應如來佛祖護送你師傅唐三藏去取西經，你居然跟牛魔王串通要吃你師傅。你知不知道你犯了彌天大罪？

Monkey King：Bitch! You've followed me for 3 days. I didn’t beat you up because you’re a woman. Don’t think that I’m afraid of you.

悟空：少羅嗦！你追了我三天三夜，因為你是女人我才不殺你，不要以為我怕了你了！

Tang Monk：Monkey King， be polite to Goddess!

唐僧：悟空，你怎么可以這樣跟觀音姐姐講話呢？

Monkey King：Shut up.

悟空：嘩！不要吵！

Tang Monk：You scare me again.

唐僧：你又在嚇我！

Monkey King：Now， I can’t escape， I will fight with you.

悟空：既然躲不了那老孫就跟你決一死戰！(悟空將月光寶盒隨手一拋，正好砸在唐僧頭上)

Tang Monk：What’s up?

唐僧：又干什么？(倆人正要動手，突然……)

Tang Monk：Don’t be angry. You may violate the rule. Monkey King， you’re so naughty! I’ve told you not to throw things! This is wrong to throw things. You’ve thrown away the stick. Pandora’s Box is a treasure. You’ll pollute the environment. You’ll hurt kids. If there are no kids， it is bad to hurt plants.

唐僧：哎哎哎！大家不要生氣，生氣會犯了嗔戒的！悟空你也太調皮啦，我跟你說過叫你不要亂扔東西，亂扔東西這么做…你看我還沒說完你又把棍子給扔掉了！月光寶盒是寶物，你把他扔掉會污染環境。唉，要是砸到小朋友那怎么辦？就算沒有砸到小朋友砸到那些花花草草也是不對的呀！(悟空一把抓住唐僧手中的月光寶盒)

Tang Monk：What’s up?

唐僧：干什么？

Monkey King：Let go!

悟空：放手！

Tang Monk：You want? Speak up if you want! Why do you keep silent? Why are you looking at me? Although your eyes are full of sincerity， I’m very glad， you still have to speak up. Take it! Do you really like? Really?

唐僧：你想要啊？悟空，你要是想要的話你就說話嘛，你不說我怎么知道你想要呢，雖然你很有誠意地看著我，可是你還是要跟我說你想要的。你真的想要嗎？那你就拿去吧！你不是真的想要吧？難道你真的想要嗎？……

Monkey King：Shit!

悟空：我Kao！(悟空一拳將唐僧打倒)

Kwan-yin：Monkey King……

觀音：啊？孫悟空……

Monkey King：See， this guy keeps talking all the time， we don’t know what he’s talking about. He’s just like a fly hanging around. Sorry， not a fly. It’s a swarm of flies flying near your ears…… Flying into your brain. Help. Help!

悟空：大家看到啦？這個家伙沒事就長篇大論婆婆媽媽嘰嘰歪歪，就好像整天有一只蒼蠅，嗡……對不起，不是一只，是一堆蒼蠅圍著你，嗡…嗡…嗡…嗡…飛到你的耳朵里面，救命，救命啊！(悟空倒地翻滾，異常痛苦)

Monkey King：So I catch that fly. Open its belly. Take out its intestine. Put its intestine around its own neck. Then I pull the intestine tightly. Everybody， the tongue comes out. I use a blade and cut! Wow! All the people keep silent. Now you know why…… Why I need to kill.

悟空：所以呢我就抓住蒼蠅擠破它的肚皮把它的腸子扯出來再用它的腸子勒住他的脖子用力一拉，呵——！整條舌頭都伸出來啦！我再手起刀落嘩——！整個世界清凈了。現在大家明白，為什么我要殺他！

Kwan-yin：Monkey King， you have so many excuses. You don’t want to get scriptures in the west.

觀音：哼！悟空，你諸多借口，你根本就不想去取西經！

Monkey King：Shut up please! Beat! I’ve got a super body. You can't hurt me. I don’t scare of any god.

悟空：說那么多干什么，打呀！我老孫有金剛不壞之身，十個觀音我都不放在眼里。(倆人一番斗法，悟空被觀音降服收入甘露瓶)

Kwan-yin：I’m gonna punish you.

觀音：今天我要替天行道！

Tang Monk：If a disciple has made a mistake， his master needs to take the responsibility. Goddess， please pardon him!

唐僧：哎哎！徒弟有錯做師傅的也有責任，求姐姐放他一條生路吧！

Kwan-yin：I have to do so， I need to report to Heaven Emperor.

觀音：我不消滅他沒法兒向玉皇大帝交代！

Tang Monk：Goddess， please tell Heaven Emperor， I can sacrifice my life for him.

唐僧：請姐姐跟玉皇大帝說一聲，貧僧愿意一命賠一命！(合十坐地，將法杖向空中一拋)

Tang Monk：Longevity Monk.

唐僧：喃嘸阿彌陀佛！(法杖將唐僧砸死)