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翻譯擂臺(tái)(第19期)

2018-11-28 06:20:40林巍
英語(yǔ)世界 2018年1期

【點(diǎn)評(píng)】

面對(duì)來勢(shì)兇猛的日本侵略軍,蔣介石此時(shí)已經(jīng)發(fā)現(xiàn)和平無(wú)望,故下了抗戰(zhàn)到底的決心。1937年7月31日,蔣在廬山發(fā)表了一篇激憤無(wú)比的抗戰(zhàn)宣言,所選其中這幾句尤其情感激昂。

[1]中,“已快要臨到”,參賽譯文如“We are almost and nearly come to… / We are almost on the verge of… / … is almost on the brink of… / We are on the threshold of…”等,似都可以,但還可更簡(jiǎn)練些。

“悲慘”,大都用了misery、miserable、tragic、pitiful、sad and shocking等,都可接受;而“境地”用得較多的有dilemma、predicament、plight、occasion、stage、circumstance、condition等。分析起來,dilemma的本義為the state of uncertainty or perplexity especially as requiring a choice between equally unfavorable options,如:①He was faced with the dilemma of whether or not to return to his country.(要不要回國(guó),他進(jìn)退兩難。)②The issue raises a moral dilemma.(這個(gè)問題引發(fā)了一個(gè)道德上的兩難抉擇。)predicament和plight也類似,都有dif ficult and unpleasant 的性質(zhì),如:①the club’s financial predicament(俱樂部的財(cái)政困境)②The country’s economic plight is strangling its scienti fic institutions.(該國(guó)的經(jīng)濟(jì)困境阻礙了其科研機(jī)構(gòu)的工作進(jìn)展。)顯然,這三個(gè)詞用在這里,性質(zhì)上都不夠準(zhǔn)確。而occasion,其原義為“a time when something happens, or a case of it happening”,如:①It is an occasion for all the family to celebrate.(這是個(gè)值得舉家慶祝的時(shí)刻。)②It is always an important occasion for setting out government policy.(這歷來都是闡明政府政策的重要時(shí)機(jī)。)在此處又顯分量不夠。至于stage,則相差更遠(yuǎn),其義為a period or state that passes through while developing or making progress,即發(fā)展進(jìn)程中的一個(gè)階段。所以,在選擇詞語(yǔ)時(shí)應(yīng)首先了解其英文原義。就此而言,circumstance、situation、condition是比較適宜的,盡管也有程度和范疇的區(qū)別,不過其中有著基本的相通因素:circumstance—the conditions and facts that are connected with and affect a situation, an event or an action;situation—the combination of circumstances at a given time;condition—a state in a particular situation。特別是condition,在不同的語(yǔ)境中有著差異較大的多種含義,如一般來講,可有“The report can probably provide some information concerning current political, economic or financial situation.(該報(bào)告可能提供當(dāng)前政治、經(jīng)濟(jì)或財(cái)務(wù)等相關(guān)方面的一些信息。)”;具體而言,“Conditions for the poor in Los Angeles have not improved.(洛杉磯窮人的境況仍未得到改善。)”;個(gè)人來說,“We have all been in similar embarrassing situations.(我們都遇到過類似的尷尬局面。)”,甚至,“他身體欠佳。(He is not in good condition.)”“生命垂危(critical condition)”等。考慮到與前面用到的那些形容詞相搭配,condition用在這里似更為適宜。

對(duì)于“人格”,參賽譯文用得最多的是personality和character,如which is unbearable as long as one has the least personality / which cannot be endured by any nation with a little personality / where even a nation with a least character is not disposed to suffer it / where any nation of character in the world can’t bear 等,顯然有根據(jù)字面意思、查詞典尋找對(duì)等詞的痕跡。其實(shí),personality(the complex of all the attributes-behavioral, temperamental, emotional and mental—that characterize a unique individual)主要指人的特性和魅力,如:①a woman of great personality(極有個(gè)性的女人)②Through sheer force of personality Hugh Trenchard had got his way.(休·特倫查德完全憑借個(gè)人魅力就能隨心所欲。)③他很有個(gè)人魅力,非常風(fēng)趣。(He is such a personality—he is so funny.)而the character of a person or place consists of all the qualities they have that make them distinct from other people or places,如:①That is the other side of his character.(那是他性格中的另一面。)②The character of this country has been formed by immigration.(這個(gè)國(guó)家的國(guó)民性是由移民形成的。)③中國(guó)特色的社會(huì)主義(socialism with Chinese characters/characteristics)有參賽者用了national pride,似乎吻合,但是該詞一般用于和平、積極的意義,如:This success has greatly boosted a deep sense of national pride.(這一成功極大地提升了民族自豪感。)而原文的話語(yǔ)是在民族陷于戰(zhàn)爭(zhēng)災(zāi)難、面臨亡國(guó)滅種之時(shí)講的,所以顯得不協(xié)調(diào)。類似的,還有self-pride、self-respect、self-esteem等。還有參賽者用了human dignity,如“We are going to be confronted with a miserable situation which nations with human dignity can’t be unbearable.”,而該詞一般是在更大或比較的語(yǔ)境下講的,如:It’s an affront to human dignity to keep someone alive like this.(如此維持一個(gè)人的生命是對(duì)人類尊嚴(yán)的冒犯。)同時(shí)應(yīng)當(dāng)指出的是,can’t be unbearable為否定之否定,成為肯定(bearable),故意思恰好相反,此類錯(cuò)誤在參賽譯文中并不罕見。其實(shí),dignity即可,如:①We should treat others with dignity and respect.(我們應(yīng)當(dāng)尊重和善待他人。)②She’s got too much dignity to descend to writing anonymous letters.(她是個(gè)自尊心很強(qiáng)的人,絕不會(huì)自貶身份去寫匿名信。)

故此,該句不妨譯為:We are to be trapped in such miserable conditions that no nation with dignity in the world could bear them anymore.

[2]中,“不能不”不宜簡(jiǎn)單理解為“能”,can沒有譯出不得已的語(yǔ)氣,可為have to、cannot but,或更重一點(diǎn)的“… have no choice but…”等。

“戰(zhàn)爭(zhēng)既開”,有參賽者用了we resort to the war,好像是主動(dòng)利用戰(zhàn)爭(zhēng)去解決問題,如:She would never resort to the law courts to resolve her marital problems.(她無(wú)論如何不會(huì)上法庭去解決婚姻問題。)這顯然不合適。

“妥協(xié)”,參賽譯文用得最多的是compromise、relinquish、abdication、concede、concession等。一般而言,compromise(a middle way between two extremes)有一種對(duì)等條件下的平和語(yǔ)氣,如:Some protagonists may come to their senses and seek a compromise.(對(duì)抗雙方中有些人可能在理性思考后達(dá)成妥協(xié)。)故在此處性質(zhì)有所不同。而relinquish多指財(cái)產(chǎn)和權(quán)利方面的分割(part with a possession or right),如:①She relinquished possession of the house to her sister.(她將房子讓給了妹妹。)②他被迫放棄對(duì)公司的控制權(quán)。(He was forced to relinquish control of the company.)顯然范疇有別。類似的還有abdication,其義為a formal resignation and renunciation of powers,參賽譯文如“The abdication of territory and sovereignty will degrade us to be eternal sinners.”應(yīng)當(dāng)說用詞造句還是比較講究的。concede與concession類同,因concession 的原義為the act of conceding or yielding,如:①We cannot concede any of our territory.(我們決不能放棄一寸國(guó)土。)②There is a call for the concession of certain rights.(人們要求承認(rèn)某些權(quán)利。)

值得一提的是,“主權(quán)”不同于一般的“權(quán)利”“權(quán)力”和“控制權(quán)”,而是sovereignty,如澳門的回歸,不是resume sovereignty,而是收回了“管制權(quán)”(administration and jurisdiction),因葡萄牙從未對(duì)澳門擁有領(lǐng)土主權(quán)。

將“是中華民族的千古罪人”譯成we shall be guilty of committing an unpardonable offense against our race,值得商榷:offense是“a lack of politeness;a failure to show regard for others; wounding the feelings or others”,用在此處顯然太“輕”了,如:The book might be published without creating offense.(出版這本書可能不會(huì)引起人們的反感。)當(dāng)然,criminal offense、fatal offense則又有所不同;而our race屬多余,因這里不言自明。

故此,該句不妨譯為:We have no choice but to stand up and fight back.Once the war breaks out, as a weak nation, there will be no chance for us to make any concessions—a bit of loss of territory or sovereignty will stand condemned throughout the ages…

[3]中,對(duì)于“地?zé)o分南北”,許多參賽者譯成“the land will not distinguish between north and south / Anyone, no matter they come from north or south /regardless of the north or the south”等,其實(shí)這只是一種籠統(tǒng)說法,難道就不包括東西嗎?故可統(tǒng)而述之。

“有……之責(zé)任”,一般譯文用了responsibility、duty等,但應(yīng)注意前面的動(dòng)詞或介詞的固定搭配,如accept、assume、bear、carry、recognize、shoulder、take、take on、take over、place、acknowledge 等,而不是demonstrate、stay、 show等,不應(yīng)過于隨意。

對(duì)“皆應(yīng)抱定犧牲一切之決心”,許多人翻譯得很帶感情,似乎用了最重的詞句,如“… with last full measure of devotion / Everyone will have to give up everything that he has / shall combat valiantly at whatever cost unless being subjugated”等,但還應(yīng)力求找到最恰當(dāng)、簡(jiǎn)約的“那一個(gè)”;例如,相比參賽譯文中的to give up,此處用sacri fice更帶一種莊重與儀式感。

故此,該句不妨譯為:From day one of the war, everybody across the country,the young and the old, will all be mobilized and determined to sacri fice everything as they assume duties to fight against the enemy and defend our motherland.

由此可見,翻譯中的選詞用語(yǔ)首先要注重譯入語(yǔ)的原義,其次才是其引申含義;更重要的是,譯者要能設(shè)身處地到原文當(dāng)時(shí)的語(yǔ)境之中,反復(fù)體會(huì)、比較,從而找到最恰當(dāng)?shù)谋磉_(dá)方式。 □

(點(diǎn)評(píng)人:林巍,暨南大學(xué)翻譯學(xué)院特聘教授)

【優(yōu)勝者】

@睡不醒的顧冰 @manny @Nicholas @Lorna

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