The New Year’s Day Party

姜經(jīng)志

Tomorrow is the New Years Day. Yesterday all the students in Class 1， Grade 8 asked the head teacher Mr. Zhang to have a New Years Day party. My Zhang told the monitor to organize the activity.

“Excuse me， Mr. Wang. We need some help. Could you please help us write the words， ‘Happy New Years Day！ and draw something on the blackboard？” asked Wang Hui. Mr. Wang said， “Sorry， I cant. I have to have art classes. You can do① yourselves.”

Wang Hui said to Li Ying who is good at draw②， “Could you please write and draw something on the blackboard？” “Sure，” said Li Ying.

“Hello， everyone！ Could you please clean and decorate the classroom？”

“Sure.”

Two hours later， everything were③ ready for the party.

安徽省濉溪縣百善中心學(xué)校九（3）班 周麗

點(diǎn)評(píng)

1. 優(yōu)點(diǎn)：

小作者能根據(jù)寫(xiě)作要求，展開(kāi)聯(lián)想，將文章按事件發(fā)生的先后順序來(lái)組織文章，這樣文章就顯得條理十分清晰，而且運(yùn)用了剛學(xué)過(guò)的語(yǔ)言點(diǎn)，寫(xiě)好短文；此外，主題鮮明，表達(dá)流暢，這些都是本文的閃光點(diǎn)。然而，也有錯(cuò)誤存在，仍要努力練筆。

2. 需要修改的地方：

① 在do后面加上代詞it。 it用來(lái)代替要做的事情。

② 把draw改為動(dòng)名詞drawing。因?yàn)榻樵~at后用名詞或動(dòng)名詞。

③ 把此處的were改為was。因?yàn)楫?dāng)everything， somebody， everyone等復(fù)合不定代詞作主語(yǔ)時(shí)，動(dòng)詞用單數(shù)形式。

3. 評(píng)分：

按中考英語(yǔ)作文滿分20的評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)，本文修改前可得17分。