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FUNNY STORIES

2012-04-29 00:00:00席寧
今日中學生(初一版) 2012年3期

A lot of boys and girls in western countries are wearing the same kinds of clothes, and many of them have a long hair, so it is often difficult to tell whether they are boys or girls.

One day an old man went for a walk in a park of the city and when he was tired, he sat down on a chair by a swimming pool. A young person was standing on the other side of the pool.

“Oh!” the old man said to the person sitting next to him on the chair. “Do you see that person with the loose(寬松的)clothes and long hair? Is it a boy or girl?”

“A girl,” said his neighbour,“She is my daughter.”

“Oh!”the old man said quicky.“I'm sorry, I didn't know that you are her mother.”

“I'm not,”said the other person,“I'm her father.”

John likes chocolates very much, but his mother never gives him any, because they are bad for his teeth, she thinks. But John has a very nice grandfather. The old man loves his grandson very much, and sometimes he brings John chocolates when he comes to visit him. Then his mother lets him eat them, because she wants to make the old man happy.

One evening, a few days before John's seventh birthday, he was saying his prayers(祈禱)in his bedroom before he went to bed. “Please, God,”he shouted, “make them give me a big box of chocolates for my birthday on Saturday.”

His mother was in the kitchen, but she heard the boy shouting and went into his room quickly.

“Why are you shouting, John?”she asked her son, “God can hear you when you talk quietly.”

“I know,”answered the boy with a smile.“but grandfather is in the next room, and he can't.”

Mr Green worked in a shop. The shop sold, cleaned and repaired hearing-aids(助聽器).

One day an old man entered and put one down in front of him without saying a word.

“What's the matter with it?”Mr Green said.

The man didn't answer. Of course Mr Green thought the man must be deaf and something must be wrong with his hearing-aid, so he said again, more loudly,“What's wrong with your hearing-aid, sir?” Again the man said nothing, so Mr Green shouted his question again as loudly as he could.

The man then took a pen and a piece of paper and wrote, “It isn't necessary to shout when you are speaking to me. My ears are as good as yours. This hearing-aid is my wife's, not mine. I've just had a throat(喉嚨)operation. I can hear very well, but I can't speak!”

In a magazine recently there are several pictures of a clever monkey. This monkey is a woman's. She is an American housewife. She has had the monkey for many years. The interesting fact about the monkey is that it can wash dishes. He washes the dishes for the woman every day. He likes to wash dishes. He'll spend hour after hour washing dishes. He never breaks a dish. But sometimes he washes the dishes over and over(三番五次). If the woman tries to stop him, he then gets angry. He begins to throw dishes in all directions. But this does not happen very often.

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