摘要: 英語(yǔ)高考中的書(shū)面表達(dá)題型反映了學(xué)生綜合運(yùn)用語(yǔ)言的實(shí)際能力。本文以高考英語(yǔ)作文的評(píng)分原則為標(biāo)準(zhǔn),從怎樣寫(xiě)“好”一篇英語(yǔ)作文的角度出發(fā),討論了高分書(shū)面表達(dá)的特點(diǎn);從詞匯求新、結(jié)構(gòu)句法求變和謀篇布局求奇三方面入手,探究如何寫(xiě)好一篇高考英語(yǔ)書(shū)面表達(dá)。
關(guān)鍵詞: 詞匯 多樣性 流暢性 謀篇
高考中的書(shū)面表達(dá)是一種能反映學(xué)生表達(dá)傳遞信息和解決實(shí)際問(wèn)題的語(yǔ)言交流能力的重要語(yǔ)言測(cè)試手段,對(duì)英語(yǔ)教學(xué)有十分積極的反撥作用。然而在寫(xiě)作教學(xué)中,很多學(xué)生甚至部分教師經(jīng)常把側(cè)重點(diǎn)放在如何“寫(xiě)對(duì)”高考英語(yǔ)作文,造成學(xué)生力求“寫(xiě)穩(wěn)”,不思考如何“寫(xiě)好”作文。試題評(píng)分原則中指出:“評(píng)分時(shí),要注意的主要內(nèi)容為:內(nèi)容要點(diǎn),應(yīng)用詞匯和語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)的數(shù)量和準(zhǔn)確性及上下文的連貫性及語(yǔ)言的得體性。”高考書(shū)面表達(dá)評(píng)分標(biāo)準(zhǔn)中最高檔次(21—25分)關(guān)于語(yǔ)言一項(xiàng)的要求是“應(yīng)用了較多的語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯,語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu),但為盡量使用較復(fù)雜結(jié)構(gòu)或較高級(jí)詞匯所致;具備較強(qiáng)的語(yǔ)言應(yīng)用能力”。當(dāng)然,寫(xiě)“好”一篇書(shū)面表達(dá)的前提是寫(xiě)“對(duì)”文章,即準(zhǔn)確性,包括審題準(zhǔn)確、語(yǔ)法結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯方面的準(zhǔn)確性。本文旨在從寫(xiě)“好”文章入手,從好作文的評(píng)分
原則出發(fā),分析遣詞、造句、謀篇等寫(xiě)作元素,探究如何寫(xiě)一篇高分書(shū)面表達(dá)。
一、詞匯選擇求新
詞匯的選擇,處處體現(xiàn)出作者的詞匯能力和整體英語(yǔ)水平。如果僅僅記住幾個(gè)簡(jiǎn)單基礎(chǔ)的詞匯,而且一味地重復(fù)低水平的英語(yǔ)知識(shí)點(diǎn),就遠(yuǎn)遠(yuǎn)沒(méi)有達(dá)到大學(xué)的入學(xué)要求,高考畢竟是選拔性考試。因此選用高級(jí)詞匯,哪怕只用一個(gè),都會(huì)讓你的作文脫穎而出。這就要求考生在平時(shí)的訓(xùn)練和考試當(dāng)中,有意識(shí)地強(qiáng)化“復(fù)雜、高級(jí)”這兩個(gè)概念,使自己的作文區(qū)別于其他學(xué)生的作文,使自己一下子就站在一個(gè)比別人高的位置上,充分顯示自己的實(shí)力。請(qǐng)?bào)w會(huì)下面句子中斜體部分被括號(hào)中的高級(jí)詞匯替代后的效果。
1)這是個(gè)好辦法。
That’s a very good idea.(terrific)
2)他昨晚沒(méi)空發(fā)言。
He was not free for comment last night.(available)
3)這件事情很難的。
It’s a difficult job.(challenging)
4)旅途結(jié)束后我感到很累。
I really felt very tired at the end of the journey.(exhausted/worn-out)
如access, claim, concern, deserve, essential, enable, fascinated,schedule等都屬于高級(jí)詞匯,平時(shí)要活學(xué)活用。
對(duì)于“較復(fù)雜的詞匯”,可以從以下幾個(gè)方面著手。
1.注意使用詞組、習(xí)語(yǔ)來(lái)代替一些單詞,以增加文采。如:
A new railway is being built in my hometown.
改為:A new railway is under construction in my hometown.
2.使用一些有“洋味”的單詞。如:
Thank you for sharing the time with us.
The way he views the world is very practical.
3.避免重復(fù)使用某一單詞或短語(yǔ)。如:
I like reading while my brother likes watching television.
改為:I like reading while my brother enjoys watching television.
如果一篇作文里需要多次使用相同意思的詞,表達(dá)方式的變換顯得很重要,否則不免有黔驢技窮之嫌。在平時(shí)閱讀中,要注重同一意義的多種表達(dá)方式。比如,“上學(xué)”可以是“start school”或“attend school”。又如,介紹人物的影響及人們對(duì)人物的評(píng)價(jià),可以是:
He became famous for his new theory.
The people had come to love him as an inspiring leader.
We regard Li Fei as our model.
Lei Feng has been praised for his communist spirit.
People spoke highly of him and all respected him.
4.注重遣詞準(zhǔn)確貼切。如:
I’d like to introduce this book for you to read.
改為:I’d like to recommend this book for you to read.
recommend 和introduce都可以譯為“介紹”,但句子中動(dòng)詞要表達(dá)推薦一本好書(shū)來(lái)讀,而recommend的內(nèi)在含義是“say something is good,and worth using and having”,而introduce的內(nèi)在含義是“初次見(jiàn)面介紹人或引進(jìn)新產(chǎn)品等”含義。不是所有的英語(yǔ)都能找到與之對(duì)應(yīng)的漢語(yǔ)表達(dá)。因此寫(xiě)作文時(shí),機(jī)械地翻譯句子是不可取的。平時(shí)只有多查字典,多閱讀,感悟英語(yǔ)單詞在上下文中的含義,才能準(zhǔn)確全面地理解單詞的意義。遣詞準(zhǔn)確貼切能使文章地道,而不是一篇中國(guó)式(Chenglish)的英文作文。
二、結(jié)構(gòu)句法求變
1.簡(jiǎn)潔性就是做到語(yǔ)言精煉,不重復(fù)。
高考書(shū)面表達(dá)篇幅短,不容許過(guò)度添加信息,所以句子表達(dá)力求言簡(jiǎn)意賅。寫(xiě)作時(shí)要用簡(jiǎn)潔明了的語(yǔ)言,避免不必要的詞語(yǔ)。例如:
1)Personally I think he is a good student.
改為:I think he is a good student.
2)I seldom go to the Shanghai Library due to the reason that it is far away from my home.
改為:I seldom go to the Shanghai Library because it is far away from my home.
4)Once you are inside,follow the path.
改為:Once inside,follow the path.
同時(shí),根據(jù)英語(yǔ)語(yǔ)言特點(diǎn),進(jìn)行巧妙替換,可以令句子更加簡(jiǎn)潔。例如:
1)Now it’s time to tell you everything that has happened.
Now it’s time to tell you the whole story.(名詞替代從句)
2)She helped the old man to sit down in the armchair.
She helped the old man into the armchair.(介詞代替動(dòng)詞)
3)It was the dog that jumped in the river and pulled the girl to the safe place.
It was the dog that jumped in the river and pulled the girl to safety.(抽象名詞代替具體名詞)
2.多樣性就是能隨情景內(nèi)容的變化寫(xiě)出句式多樣的語(yǔ)句。
《新課程標(biāo)準(zhǔn)》中寫(xiě)作的評(píng)價(jià)標(biāo)準(zhǔn),強(qiáng)調(diào)了語(yǔ)言表達(dá)的能力:語(yǔ)言結(jié)構(gòu)和詞匯豐富。因此,在確保行文準(zhǔn)確流暢的前提下,需要文字清新簡(jiǎn)約,語(yǔ)句靈活多變,使文章的語(yǔ)言結(jié)構(gòu)更加豐富多彩。所以造句能力在英文寫(xiě)作中是非常重要的。好的英語(yǔ)句子能夠生動(dòng)、形象、準(zhǔn)確地表達(dá)內(nèi)容。所以要想寫(xiě)出漂亮的書(shū)面表達(dá),首先必須從寫(xiě)好句子開(kāi)始。學(xué)生造句要防止兩個(gè)極端:一種是害怕出錯(cuò),全部用簡(jiǎn)單句,作文顯得幼稚、單調(diào)、英語(yǔ)功底淺;另一種是追求高深,將句子復(fù)雜化,文章讀起來(lái)令人費(fèi)解,容易產(chǎn)生歧異。比較好的做法是根據(jù)文章內(nèi)容需要,適當(dāng)選擇句型,注意句式變化和長(zhǎng)短句搭配。靈活運(yùn)用各種句式,如現(xiàn)在分詞作句首狀語(yǔ)或句末狀語(yǔ),強(qiáng)調(diào)句、感嘆句、with復(fù)合賓語(yǔ)句型、such as列舉句型、such be總結(jié)句型等。這些句型相對(duì)簡(jiǎn)單易學(xué),表達(dá)效果也不錯(cuò),更重要的是,只要掌握其用法特點(diǎn),并有意識(shí)地加以使用,高考一定能巧妙地將其派上用場(chǎng)并為文章增添風(fēng)采。例如:
1)改變句子的開(kāi)頭方式,不要一味地都是以主語(yǔ)開(kāi)頭,接著是謂語(yǔ)、賓語(yǔ),最后再加一個(gè)狀語(yǔ)。可以把狀語(yǔ)置于句首,或用分詞作狀語(yǔ)等。
We met at the school gate and went there together early in the morning.
改為:Early in the morning we met at the school gate and went there together.
The young man could not help crying when he heard the bad news.
改為:Hearing the bad news,the young man could not help crying.
2)在整篇文章中,避免只使用一兩個(gè)句式,要靈活運(yùn)用諸如倒裝句、強(qiáng)調(diào)句、主從復(fù)合句、分詞狀語(yǔ)等。
①?gòu)?qiáng)調(diào)句
My parents praised Jack warmly. He had saved my little sister bravely.
改為:My parents praised Jack warmly. It was our brave Jack who had saved my little sister bravely.
②由what等引導(dǎo)的從句,此處的what相當(dāng)于中文的“所……”,有很大的概括力,如:
We had to stand there to catch the offender.
改為:What we had to do was(to)stand there,trying to catch the offender.
What China has achieved in recent years is known throughout the world.
改為:China is no longer what it used to be.
③由with或without引導(dǎo)的短語(yǔ)。如:
He sat in a chair with a newspaper in the hand.
④分詞短語(yǔ)。如:
Satisfied with the result,he decided to go on with a new experiment.
⑤倒裝句。如:
Only in this way can we achieve our goal.
Never before have I seen such a wonderful film.
⑥省略句。如:
If so,victory will be ours.
You can make some changes wherever necessary.
⑦對(duì)比,這是中文中也常用的方法。如:
Failure is not a crime,but failure to learn from failure is.
When I play,I feel excited,and after it I feel relaxed.
學(xué)生能在考場(chǎng)寫(xiě)作中靈活運(yùn)用各種句式,平時(shí)一句多譯是一種有效的訓(xùn)練方法,能激發(fā)并強(qiáng)化學(xué)生對(duì)不同句式的掌握。
例如:
a.這本書(shū)花了我300元。
I spent 300 yuan on the book.
I paid 300 yuan for the book.
The price of the book is 300 yuan.
It cost me 300 yuan to buy the book.
b.昨天下午他才來(lái)。
He came here yesterday afternoon.
He didn’t come here until yesterday afternoon.
Not until yesterday afternoon did he come here.
It was yesterday afternoon that he arrived here.
It was not until yesterday afternoon that he came here.
3.流暢性。
寫(xiě)作是綜合語(yǔ)言運(yùn)用能力的反映。如果只求語(yǔ)法正確,勉強(qiáng)堆砌詞句,而不顧句與句、段落與段落的邏輯關(guān)系,就使文章讀起來(lái)缺乏整體感,晦澀難懂。高分書(shū)面表達(dá)有個(gè)共性就是有效地使用了語(yǔ)句間的連接成分,使全文結(jié)構(gòu)緊湊。教師應(yīng)增強(qiáng)學(xué)生的語(yǔ)篇意識(shí)讓學(xué)生了解組句成篇的技巧,以求全文的連貫和緊湊。
1)使用副詞性連接詞
在寫(xiě)作中,一定要注意發(fā)掘要點(diǎn)或句子間的邏輯聯(lián)系,從而找到并運(yùn)用適當(dāng)?shù)倪B接詞,使不同的句子間建立起有機(jī)的聯(lián)系。以下列舉一些常見(jiàn)的連接詞:
①遞進(jìn):also,additionally,besides,furthermore,moreover,as well as
②表示先后順序:meanwhile,earlier,afterwards
③轉(zhuǎn)折:however,yet,instead,on the contrary,after all
④總結(jié):finally,at last,in brief,in conclusion,in a word
⑤強(qiáng)調(diào):indeed,certainly,surely,above all
⑥對(duì)比:in the same way,just as,on the one hand...on the other hand
⑦表示結(jié)果:as a result,therefore,in this way
⑧表示舉例:for example,for instance,specifically
⑨表達(dá)觀點(diǎn):generally,basically,in other words,apparently
例如:a.The child was thick.He didn’t go to school.
改為:The child was sick;therefore,he didn’t go to school.
b.When we were young,our parents gave us the best that they could offer.Now it’s time for us to do something for them in return. Nowadays,the main problem for the elderly people is loneliness. Therefore, we should spare some time with them,listening to their problems and bringing them new hopes in life.(寥寥數(shù)句,表達(dá)了敬老的完整意思。全段貫穿因果關(guān)系,用了now,nowadays,therefore等連接詞語(yǔ),使句與句之間緊接、連貫、過(guò)渡流暢。)
2)使用代詞指代上一句中的名詞和重復(fù)使用上一句中的詞使文章連貫
例如:①I(mǎi)n summer,father had his usual two or three weeks of vacation.These were normally spent at the seaside or in the mountains. (通過(guò)兩個(gè)不同的代詞his和代表“假期”的these,使文章緊密相連。)
②We used to take a plane when we went abroad.But people in our country are using planes more often than before. A plane trip saves time but involves great risks.(三句都出現(xiàn)了plane一詞,使它們牢牢掛住。)
3)使用分詞作狀語(yǔ),表示伴隨,原因等不同的意義,使上下文連接緊密。高考作文的范文中總能找到分詞作狀語(yǔ)的句子。例如:
I sat there with my head in my hands. I became more disappointed by the minute.
改為: I sat there with my head in my hands,growing more disappointed by the minute.
4.靈活性,就是轉(zhuǎn)換角度,化難為易。
英語(yǔ)寫(xiě)作過(guò)程中,總會(huì)碰到一些陌生的內(nèi)容,均可以通過(guò)轉(zhuǎn)換,將陌生的詞匯變?yōu)樽约菏煜さ脑~匯和句法表達(dá)。千萬(wàn)別思維僵化,機(jī)械地翻譯,不敢越雷池半步,必然寫(xiě)不出生動(dòng)的文章來(lái)。例如:他到深圳打工去了。He went to Shenzhen and tried his luck.例句中避開(kāi)了陌生詞匯“打工”。例如:他很會(huì)蒙混過(guò)關(guān)。He is quite capable of lying to get out of trouble.劃線部分就很好地表達(dá)了“蒙混過(guò)關(guān)”。寫(xiě)作時(shí)發(fā)揮主觀能動(dòng)作用的過(guò)程,考試時(shí)雖然有題目限制,但是回旋的余地很大,完全靠自己靈活地把握,將自己的最佳水平發(fā)揮出來(lái)。
三、謀篇布局求奇
1.寫(xiě)好起始句。
筆者參加了2005年江蘇省高考英語(yǔ)作文的網(wǎng)上閱卷工作。閱卷老師每天的平均閱卷量是800份卷子,因此好的起始句,能使你的作文成為考場(chǎng)上“萬(wàn)綠叢中一點(diǎn)紅”,給閱卷老師一絲清新的綠意。比如,寫(xiě)一份題目?jī)H提供了參觀日期參觀內(nèi)容的通知,大部分學(xué)生會(huì)在第一句表達(dá)參觀的日期。但如以“We have a busy day planned for tomorrow.”作為起始句,則很奇,不落俗套。此外,寫(xiě)好結(jié)尾,千萬(wàn)不要虎頭蛇尾。做到首尾呼應(yīng),前后相連,可以大幅度增強(qiáng)文章的照應(yīng)性、邏輯性和可讀性,也可以給閱卷老師一個(gè)良好的印象。起句當(dāng)如爆竹,驟響易徹;尾句當(dāng)如撞鐘,清音有余。
2.調(diào)整要點(diǎn)順序。
寫(xiě)作時(shí)學(xué)生不應(yīng)把材料中所提供的要點(diǎn)表達(dá)當(dāng)成是英語(yǔ)行文的表達(dá)順序。在寫(xiě)作前,可以將要點(diǎn)依據(jù)其邏輯順序進(jìn)行整合,能顯示出作者不拘泥于材料的靈活思維。例如:描述一個(gè)英語(yǔ)周活動(dòng)(NMET2001春)。題目提供的內(nèi)容是:1.演唱歌曲:流行歌曲;2.器樂(lè)演奏:古曲和民間音樂(lè);3.音樂(lè)比賽:聽(tīng)歌曲片斷,然后猜出處。可以這樣寫(xiě):“We will sing pop songs as one activity,then listen to classical music as another.You will have to guess where the music comes from by listening to a few seconds of songs.”在這兩句中幾乎看不出原文要點(diǎn)的影子。通過(guò)對(duì)要點(diǎn)順序的調(diào)整和重組,既表達(dá)了材料所要表達(dá)的內(nèi)容,又沒(méi)有拘泥于所提供的要點(diǎn)。平時(shí)寫(xiě)作要勤于思考,才能掌握這種寫(xiě)作技巧。
3.注意不同體裁文章的條理性。
條理性是指要合理布局文章結(jié)構(gòu)。首先,在文章思路、組織材料、敘述順序等方面要有一定的條理性。高考中開(kāi)放式作文逐漸受青睞,提示中沒(méi)有給考生列出內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)。因此提筆寫(xiě)作前,心中必須有思路來(lái)組織內(nèi)容要點(diǎn)。例如:題目要求寫(xiě)一篇敘述文,可以按照事情的發(fā)展的先后順序來(lái)寫(xiě);若介紹某一場(chǎng)所,在可按照空間順序來(lái)安排行文順序;若是一篇議論文,就應(yīng)該按照所議論觀點(diǎn)順序來(lái)安排結(jié)構(gòu)。
4.適當(dāng)添加信息。
1)不少書(shū)面表達(dá)需要使用常識(shí)性語(yǔ)句,這些語(yǔ)句雖然原材料中沒(méi)有反映,但仍很重要,它們既是重要內(nèi)容,又起著承上啟下的作用,對(duì)增強(qiáng)文章的可讀性很有好處。如在寫(xiě)通知時(shí),結(jié)尾部分可使用常識(shí)性語(yǔ)句“Don’t forget the time and address.”“I’m sure you’ll have a lot of fun.”或“I’m sure you’ll have a pleasant time.”“That’s all,thank you.”寫(xiě)參觀歡迎詞時(shí),開(kāi)頭部分可使用常識(shí)性語(yǔ)句“You’rewelcometovisitourcity.”“Now,let me tell you something about our school.”結(jié)尾部分可用“I’msureyou’llhaveapleasant journey.”“That’s all,thank you.”寫(xiě)人物介紹和單位介紹時(shí),開(kāi)頭部分可使用常識(shí)性語(yǔ)句“Now,I’d like to introduce something about our school/Li Ping to you.”介紹結(jié)束時(shí)可用“That’s all,thank you.”寫(xiě)信時(shí)可在結(jié)尾部分使用常識(shí)性語(yǔ)句“Please give my best regards/love/wishes to your parents.”或“Remember me to your parents!”“I hope to hear from you soon.”或“Waiting for your early reply.”等。縱使題目中沒(méi)有對(duì)語(yǔ)氣方面的直接要求,也必須通過(guò)適當(dāng)添加信息來(lái)表達(dá)各種語(yǔ)氣,使得語(yǔ)言語(yǔ)氣水乳交融。
2)在合乎情理規(guī)范的前提下,適當(dāng)添加信息,是令自己文章與眾不同的方法。例如:按照示意圖寫(xiě)一張便條,向應(yīng)邀的朋友說(shuō)明野餐地點(diǎn)。在結(jié)尾用上“If you have any problems,just yell.”一句話。這是在要點(diǎn)基礎(chǔ)上的適當(dāng)發(fā)揮,合情合理。如果不寫(xiě),不會(huì)失分,但它的存在,無(wú)疑提升了文章的檔次。
無(wú)論如何剖析英語(yǔ)寫(xiě)作,都是紙上談兵。若要在英語(yǔ)高考中作文得高分,貴在平時(shí)的寫(xiě)作實(shí)踐和課外廣泛的英語(yǔ)閱讀,日積月累優(yōu)美經(jīng)典的句式和文章。通過(guò)閱讀此文,學(xué)生能在寫(xiě)作實(shí)踐中有意識(shí)地運(yùn)用遣詞造句謀篇上的技巧,那么憑借平時(shí)扎實(shí)的英語(yǔ)功底,在考場(chǎng)中就能信手拈來(lái)。
參考文獻(xiàn):
[1]鄒家元,葉秀牧.寫(xiě)作語(yǔ)翻譯.復(fù)旦大學(xué)出版社,2005.
[2]陳錫麟,趙啟敏.高考英語(yǔ)寫(xiě)作范文與翻譯訓(xùn)練.海南出版社,2003.
[3]姜發(fā)兵.使高中學(xué)生英語(yǔ)書(shū)面表達(dá)更具文采.中小學(xué)英語(yǔ)教學(xué)與研究,2003,第2期.
[4]霍曉虹.高考英語(yǔ)書(shū)面表達(dá)試題分析與備考訓(xùn)練.中小學(xué)英語(yǔ)教學(xué)與研究,2003,第2期.
[5]英語(yǔ)課程標(biāo)準(zhǔn)解讀.江蘇教育出版社,2004.