Education of Filial Piety

By Zheng Yuanjie

In the 1980s, when China's economy was less prosperous, Chinese tourists would enjoy two quotas after they returned from a foreign trip.One allowed you to buy such “big items” as a fridge and a color TV； the other for such “small items” as a microwave.

After I came back from my visit to Philippines in 1986, I was offered both quotas.As the office for returned travelers in Beijing was located in Hepingli Street, north of the Dongcheng District, I rented a private car from a friend of mine and drove all the way up to the office with Zheng Yaqi, my three-yearold son.

There I bought a TV, which I found amazing.I had only seen round-cornered TVs before, but this one had four square corners, which was called a flatscreen TV—more advanced than traditional ones at that time.

I even made a fool of myself on the spot.The moment the package of the TV was opened I announced, “I won't take it.”

The office clerk was astonished.

I complained that the TV was broken.He wondered, “What's wrong with it? You didn't even give it a try!”

“You see, a part of the TV has fallen out,” I said.

“A part? What is it?” He asked.

I pulled out a black bar-shaped stuff from the box, showing to him, “Isn't it a broken part off the TV?”

He replied with a wry smile, “Oh, man, this is a remote control.”

I only knew that an ordinary TV required the viewer to control it by hand, but a TV with remote control was indeed a new thing for me.

20世紀80年代，我們中國經濟還不是特別富裕。那時候出國會有兩個指標獎勵給你，一個叫大件指標，一個叫小件指標。大件指標能買冰箱、彩電。小件指標指電子琴、微波爐這些東西。

我1986年去菲律賓回來后獲得兩個指標。當時北京的出國人員服務部在和平里。那時還沒有私家車，我借了朋友的車，帶著三歲的兒子鄭亞旗去服務部。

我買了一臺電視。那個電視我當時看了感覺很神奇。在這之前我見過的電視，屏幕的角都是圓的，可那臺電視是直的，叫直角平面電視，在當時是很先進的。

我買這臺電視的時候，還鬧了個笑話。包裝箱一打開，我就說：“這臺電視我不要。”

出國人員服務部的工作人員問：“為什么？”

我說質量不好。他問：“怎么不好，你還沒有開機呀？”

我說：“你看電視的零件都掉出來了”。他問：“哪個零件掉出來了？”

我拿出一個長方形的黑色東西，說：“這個零件都掉出來了。”那位工作人員無奈地說：“同志，這叫遙控器。”在那之前我們看電視，想轉換頻道要站起來，走到電視機前去撥電視機上頻道轉換鈕。有遙控器的電視機我從來沒見過。

Away we drove from the office, with the TV set on the car.As we moved, Zheng Yaqi realized we were on a different direction.“Where are we going to?” he asked.

“Your grandparents' home,” I said.

He wanted to know why we should visit them.“To present this wonderful TV to them,” I explained.

“Isn't it for us?” he asked.

“we will presumably outlive your grandparents, right?” I asked.

“Yeah,” he nodded.

“(Since rear projection or fullflat screen televisions didn't exist then, I put my words in a childish way for his easier understanding.) In the future, we will watch TVs with a super gun, let alone those with square corners and a flat screen,” I continued to reason with him.“So we should give this one to your grandparents.”

“Okay, you're great, Dad!” he cheered.So, we drove the television to my parents' home.

A few days later, my family had dinner together.As a rule, Chinese parents would always leave the best food for their children.In the neighborhood of the East Gate of the Temple of Heaven in Beijing was located a Hongqiao market where I got several fat prawns.When my son finished one, he found my share was left untouched.“Dad, why not eat it?” he asked.

“It's for you,” I said, “For whatever reasons, I have now developed an allergy for prawns.”

When educating children, all adults should know that kids are so perceptive that they have a smart mind for what adults say.I remember my son replying to me in this way, “Dad, please take it because I will have the chance to eat a prawn with a super gun.”

His response indicated that my education of filial piety for him had quickly yielded fruits.

(FromZheng Yuanjie's Family Education Courses, Tianjin People's Publishing House.Translation: Wang Wen)

我們拉著這臺電視機離開服務部。汽車走著走著，鄭亞旗發現路線不對，他問：“咱們這是去哪兒啊？”我說：“去你爺爺奶奶家啊。”他問：“為什么現在去爺爺奶奶家呢？”我說：“把這臺電視給你爺爺奶奶送去。”

兒子問：“這個電視咱們自己不看嗎？”我告訴他：“從理論上講，咱們會比你爺爺奶奶活得長吧？”他說：“對。”我說：“咱們將來別說看直角平面電視——因為當時我說不出來背投啦、純平啦什么的，所以就說了一句能夠讓我的兒子一下就理解的話——咱們將來看原子彈電視的機會都會有，所以這臺電視應該先給你爺爺奶奶看。”他說：“知道了。”這樣，我們就開著車，把電視給我爸爸媽媽送去了。

過了幾天，我們全家人一起吃飯。從那時到現在，爸爸媽媽都是有了好的先給孩子吃。當時我們北京有一個紅橋市場，在天壇東門附近。我去紅橋市場買了幾只特別大的對蝦。兒子吃完了一只后，看到我那只沒吃，問：“爸你怎么不吃呢？”我說：“不知道為什么，我現在對蝦過敏，你吃吧。”

所有大人跟孩子相處的時候，都要清楚這一點：孩子是洞察一切的，大人說的所有話孩子是非常清楚的。當時我的兒子說了這么一句話，他說：“爸爸，這只對蝦你就吃了吧，將來我吃原子彈蝦的機會都有。”

這件事說明我對兒子的孝順教育成功了。

（摘自《鄭淵潔家庭教育課》天津人民出版社）