Frightful’s Mountain (Excerpt III)

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Frightful had not been fed for ten hours. She was desperately hungry.Her first act of freedom would be to hunt for herself.

“驚悚時(shí)”沒(méi)已有經(jīng)進(jìn)有食十。個(gè)她小餓壞了。重獲自由后，她的第一件事就是自己狩獵去。

[2] But the forest was not the habitat she knew. Sam had trained her to hunt in abandoned fields. She circled and waited for him.

[3] He did not appear. Frightful fl ew higher. A movement on the ground caught her eye. Alice was walking on a road that wound through the pine forest. Frightful pumped her wings once and plummeted earthward. When she was twenty feet above Alice’s head, she scooped her wings, dropped her secondary feathers, and braked herself. She hovered, “waiting on” for the girl to kick through the fi elds and scare up the game as Sam would have done.

[2]但這片森林并非她所了解的地方。山姆訓(xùn)練過(guò)她在廢棄的田地上覓食。于是“驚悚”在空中盤(pán)旋著等待山姆。

[3]山姆沒(méi)有出現(xiàn)。“驚悚”飛得更高一點(diǎn)。地上的一個(gè)人影引起了她的注意。松樹(shù)林里有一條曲曲折折的小路，艾麗斯正在沿著小路行走。“驚悚”抖了抖翅膀，朝著地面速降下來(lái)。飛到距離艾麗斯頭頂二十英尺的時(shí)候，她兜起翅膀，放下輔助飛羽，減慢了速度。她盤(pán)旋在空中，等待女孩走過(guò)田野驚起獵物，就像山姆做的那樣。

[4] Alice did not look up. Her eyes were on the road. Presently she came out of the forest into open farmland.Frightful’s eyes sought movement. This was the kind of country she and Sam hunted. Tipping one wing, she moved effortlessly over an abandoned field.She waited on for Alice.

[4]艾麗斯沒(méi)有抬頭看。她的眼睛盯著小路。不一會(huì)兒她就走出森林，來(lái)到開(kāi)闊的農(nóng)田里。“驚悚”的眼睛在搜索移動(dòng)的目標(biāo)。這里正是她和山姆狩獵用的地形。她的一只翅膀稍稍傾斜，在一片廢棄的田地上方滑翔。她在等待著艾麗斯。

[5] But Alice did not come into the field. She stayed on the macadam,where nothing lived. She was in a hurry.Breaking into a run, she dashed around a bend, just as a yellow-white-andbrown dog with long ears and droopy eyes left his hideout in a culvert. He saw Alice run past him. Crouching,he pulled his tail between his legs and dropped out of sight in the daisies. He had been beaten as a pup and was terrified of people. He was thin, but not skinny, for he lived quite well on the mice and rabbits in the fi eld. The farmer who saw him from time to time called him Mole. Every time he lifted his gun to shoot the dog, Mole disappeared in the ground. The man had Mole pegged for the killer of his chickens.

[6] Mole slipped silently through a thistle patch. A pheasant burst up.Frightful rocketed earthward. She struck the bird a mortal blow and dropped with it to the ground. Instinctively she covered the food with her wings to hide it from other predators. She plucked but did not eat. She was waiting for Sam.

[5]但艾麗斯沒(méi)有來(lái)到田地上。她沿著柏油路走，驚不起任何動(dòng)物。艾麗斯很匆忙。她開(kāi)始小跑，飛快地轉(zhuǎn)過(guò)一個(gè)彎。正在這時(shí)，有一條狗從藏身的涵洞中出來(lái)。他身上的毛色黃白夾雜還有棕色，耳朵長(zhǎng)長(zhǎng)的，眼神沮喪。他看著艾麗斯從身旁跑過(guò)。他蹲下身子，尾巴夾到兩腿之間，躲到了雛菊叢里。他從小就挨揍，很怕人。他很瘦，但算不上皮包骨，因?yàn)樘锢锏睦鲜蠛屯米幼屗男∪兆舆^(guò)得還不賴。那個(gè)偶爾見(jiàn)過(guò)他的農(nóng)夫把他叫做鼴鼠。每次農(nóng)夫舉起槍來(lái)要打這條狗，鼴鼠就消失在田野里。那個(gè)農(nóng)夫認(rèn)定鼴鼠吃掉了他家的雞。

[6]鼴鼠悄無(wú)聲息地從一片薊草叢穿過(guò)。一只野雞飛起來(lái)。“驚悚”飛掠而下。她給了野雞致命一擊，然后又扔到地上。出于本能，“驚悚”用翅膀蓋住獵物，防止其他獵食者搶走。她撕扯野雞，卻沒(méi)有啄食。她在等著山姆。

[7] Mole smelled the dead pheasant and lifted his head above the thistles.Alice was gone and, seeing no other humans, he followed the scent of the game. Suddenly he burst upon not just a pheasant, but also Frightful. He stopped. Frightful lifted her feathers and threatened him. Then, holding the heavy bird in one foot, she beat her wings and skimmed over the thistles. She gained height and sped away and up.

[7]鼴鼠聞到了被殺死的野雞，從薊草叢中抬起頭來(lái)。艾麗斯已經(jīng)走遠(yuǎn)，看不到別的人，鼴鼠就沿著獵物的氣味追過(guò)來(lái)。突然之間，鼴鼠撞見(jiàn)的不只是野雞，還有“驚悚”。他停下腳步。“驚悚”撐開(kāi)羽毛威脅他。然后，“驚悚”一只腳抓起沉重的野雞，扇動(dòng)翅膀，從薊草叢上掠過(guò)。她越飛越高，越飛越快，一直往上。

[8] Like a lightning bolt, a red-tailed hawk swept under her and, upside down, grabbed the pheasant in his talons. Frightful was pulled a short distance before she opened her feet and let go of the food. Four crows fl ew out of the woods and chased the red-tailed hawk.

[8]猛然間，像閃電一般，一只紅尾鷹飛到“驚悚”身下，肚腹朝上，用利爪抓住了那只野雞。“驚悚”被拖拽了一段距離，然后松開(kāi)腳爪，放開(kāi)了食物。四只烏鴉從樹(shù)林里飛出，趕過(guò)來(lái)驅(qū)趕紅尾鷹。

【背景知識(shí)】從偷獵者手里逃脫之后，“驚悚”的困境才剛剛開(kāi)始。她從小就是山姆養(yǎng)大的，不會(huì)獨(dú)自覓食和狩獵，抓到了食物也要等山姆處理過(guò)才吃。離開(kāi)了群山中的那座山和林海中的那棵樹(shù)，“驚悚”一無(wú)所知，一切都要從零開(kāi)始：覓食、爭(zhēng)斗、求生、交友、求偶、遷徙，一個(gè)個(gè)磨難在等待著她。

【第一段】短語(yǔ)had not been fed是被動(dòng)式，直譯應(yīng)該是“沒(méi)有被喂食”，稍嫌別扭，改為中性描述“進(jìn)食”。desperately hungry也不宜直譯，轉(zhuǎn)化為“餓壞了”。最后一句的“重獲自由”也調(diào)整到句首。

【第二段】abandoned fi eld不能譯為“荒野”，要按照字面譯為“廢棄的田地”，小說(shuō)中的上下文有說(shuō)明。鑒于中英文代詞用法的差異，英文中的代詞在中文段落里要適時(shí)更換為名詞，因?yàn)橹形牟惶m合代詞一用到底，所以She要適當(dāng)轉(zhuǎn)化為驚悚；同理，下文的He要適時(shí)轉(zhuǎn)換為山姆或鼴鼠，這樣指代更清楚。

【第三段】movement本意為動(dòng)作，放在句子里有些突兀，這里明確為人影。第三句的語(yǔ)序有改變，按照中文習(xí)慣把定語(yǔ)從句提前。這一段的動(dòng)詞很精確，翻譯時(shí)要認(rèn)真琢磨，比如scoop、plummet、brake，不能簡(jiǎn)單化地直譯。secondary feathers相當(dāng)于飛機(jī)降落時(shí)展開(kāi)的輔翼，有助于放慢速度，并沒(méi)有現(xiàn)成的對(duì)應(yīng)詞語(yǔ)，這里譯為“輔助飛羽”。

【第四段】還是movement一詞，這里增譯為“移動(dòng)的目標(biāo)”。The kind of country不能譯為“這種鄉(xiāng)間”，此處指“驚悚”和山姆一般狩獵的地形，所以譯為“地形”。move effortlessly也不好譯為“輕松地移動(dòng)”，這里具體化為滑翔。

【第五段】where nothing lived（那里沒(méi)有東西生活）需要轉(zhuǎn)換一下視角來(lái)翻譯，因此譯文是“驚不起任何動(dòng)物”。He lived quite well有調(diào)侃的意味，所以中文是“小日子過(guò)得還不賴”。

【第六段】原文前三句干脆利落，文字十分簡(jiǎn)潔生動(dòng)。rocket指像火箭一樣快，譯文去掉了隱喻，只翻譯了意思“飛掠而下”。

【第七段】第一句如果直譯會(huì)是“鼴鼠聞到了死雞”，意思反而不清楚，其實(shí)是野雞被“驚悚”殺死，血腥味很濃。

【第八段】段落一開(kāi)頭如果是“像閃電一般”，跟上一段顯得不連貫，所以譯文添加了“猛然間”。upside down一般是“頭朝下”的意思，形容人，此處指紅尾鷹后背朝下肚腹朝上飛過(guò)來(lái)?yè)屖澄铮⒎穷^朝下。

【小結(jié)】這一選段看似不難，翻譯起來(lái)卻需要很多改變，因?yàn)檫@里的英文句子極為地道，中文無(wú)法直譯。譯者需要一定的英漢對(duì)比知識(shí)才更容易察覺(jué)和處理這些必須面對(duì)的差異。除了代詞差異之外，這里的英漢差異很難用幾個(gè)類別來(lái)概括，但要注意兩點(diǎn)：深入理解原文的風(fēng)格和文學(xué)效果，中文不應(yīng)該詰屈聱牙。 □

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