尷人有尬福

By+Ty+Tashiro

近幾年來，“尷尬”一詞逐漸成為流行熱詞并衍生出一系列網絡詞匯，如尬聊、尬舞、尬唱……尷尬之余令人捧腹。《生活大爆炸》中的物理學天才謝耳朵，為人傲嬌，行事古怪，常以其超群智商碾壓他人，卻患有嚴重的社交障礙——講話刻薄，聽不懂言外之意，也從不考慮別人的感受，人際交往方面令人尷尬。在現實生活中，有社交尷尬癥的人也不在少數，然而這一特殊群體雖然另類，卻散發著自身獨特的光芒。

A few years ago， “awkward” became the term du jour for the socially clumsy.1 When I looked at the number of people who Googled the question “Why am I so awkward？”， I saw a spike2 that remained consistent for five years. The sharp rise in peoples interest in awkwardness may partly reflect the trendiness of the word， but also that more people are feeling socially awkward and wonder why that might be the case.3

Today， its cool to be a nerd4. We cant get enough of awkward physicists on television shows like The Big Bang Theory or awkward millennial sex scenes on Girls.5 When Star Wars： The Force Awakens opened，fans proudly posted their cosplay photos on social media with self-aware hashtags like #awkward and #cantstop#wontstop.6

Although I am encouraged by the growing freedom awkward people have to embrace their unique interests and identity as such， there remain significant challenges.7 While awkward moments are sometimes uproariously funny， chronic awkwardness can threaten ones social inclusion and there are few things more troubling than feeling you are on the out side looking in.8

The roots of the word “awkward” come from the Old Norse9 afgr， which means “facing the wrong way.” It is a useful and relatively benign10 term compared to some of the names kids call each other， but awkward people already know that they see the world differently from most people. What awkward people need is guidance on how to navigate the social world with their unique perspective.

The imagery inspired by afgr gives us a useful clue for developing a more functional definition of awkward people. Afgr suggests that these people are facing the wrong way，but I like to think that awkward people are simply looking elsewhere.

When non-awkward people walk into a room full of people， they see the big social picture. They intuitively understand the emotional tone in the room or how formally they should act. By comparison， awkward people tend to see social situations in a fragmented11 way. Its as if they view the world with a narrow spotlight that means they see some things with intense clarity.12 Its similar to what researchers call “localised processing”， when people narrowly focus on some of the trees rather than the entire forest.endprint

This group tends to create social narratives that feel fragmented and incomplete.13 Researchers have found that awkward people are more likely than non-awkward people to process information in a detail-oriented way， which means that they sometimes have trouble seeing the bigger picture.

But what they do see is brilliantly illuminated and this gives them a deep， nuanced perspective about things that no one else takes the time to notice.14 The parts of the world that they can see are seen with remarkable clarity. There is a tremendous upside that can come from a spotlighted view of the world.15

Awkward people are not better than anyone else， they are simply different. Although they may have abilities or dispositions16 that give them great potential in some areas， awkward individuals are challenged by social situations that come naturally to most people. Awkward people do not deserve special treatment， but they can certainly benefit from some patience， an open-minded approach to their quirks， and support for the things they want to achieve in life.17 Its the same thing that any of us want， awkward or not.

1. du jour： //〈法〉流行的，熱門的；clumsy： 笨拙的，不靈巧的。

2. spike： 猛增，急升。

3. 人們對“尷尬”興趣大增，一方面反映出這個詞的流行，另一方面是由于越來越多的人感到社交尷尬，并想弄清個中緣由。

4. nerd：（書）呆子，指很聰明但在社交方面有欠缺的一類人。

5. The Big Bang Theory： 《生活大爆炸》，美國情景喜劇，講述幾個科學天才的故事；Girls：《都市女孩》，美國情景喜劇，主要講述了一群居住在紐約的二十多歲女孩的故事。

6. Star Wars： The Force Awakens：

《星球大戰：原力覺醒》，是《星球大戰》系列的第七部電影，由美國華特·迪士尼電影工作室發行的科幻動作片；cosplay： 動漫真人秀，Costume Play的簡略寫法，一般指利用服裝、飾品、道具以及化妝來扮演動漫作品、游戲中的角色；hashtag： 話題標簽。

7. 令我備受鼓舞的是，怪咖在接受自己獨特的興趣及身份等方面有了更多的自由，但是他們仍面臨著重大挑戰。embrace：欣然接受，采納。

8. 盡管尷尬時刻有時令人捧腹，但是長久如此會影響到一個人的社會融入，沒有什么比作為局外人向內張望的感覺更令人不安了。uproariously：// 引人捧腹大笑地；chronic： 長期的。

9. Old Norse： 古諾斯語（14世紀前斯堪的納維亞人所講的北日耳曼語）。

10. benign： 善良的，溫和的。

11. fragmented： 四分五裂的，分裂的。

12. 這就好像他們用照射范圍狹小的聚光燈看世界，也就意味著他們看到的某些東西會格外清晰。

13. 這個群體傾向于創造出分散而不完整的社會敘述。social narratives： 社會敘述，指通過提供相關線索，解釋對他人的感受和想法，說明恰當的社會行為期待，來為學習者描述社會情境。

14. 但是他們所看到的是被格外“照亮”的那部分，這使他們得以從深刻而細微的角度來看待他人未注意到的事物。brilliantly： 非常；illuminated： 被照亮的，發光的；nuanced： 有細微差別的。

15. 這是從聚光燈下看世界所體現出來的非常好的一面。upside： （不利局面中）好的一面，積極面。

16. disposition： 性情，性格。

17. 怪咖不需要特殊對待，但是如果大家能對他們多一些耐心，用更加開明的心態看待他們的怪癖，并支持他們所追求之事，他們定會從中受益。quirk： 怪癖。endprint