師從天降

It is a mystery how I grew to be such a tall girl， but I learned at an early age to cope with1 my size by trying to be as unremarkable as possible. At school， I wore drab2 colors and low heel shoes. I always chose a seat in the back of the room， never raised my hand in class and with my head down and shoulders stooped3， I virtually slouched4 my way through junior high school.

When I was 16， we moved to a small town. I was relatively happy in my new school although still very self-conscious about my height. Our teachers were caring and conscientious5， and I especially liked the old maid English teacher because she loved to discuss Greek mythology， and she always cried when she read poetry to us. The first day of classes in my senior year， however， the school was abuzz6 with the news that the old maid had left to get married and that we were going to have a new English teacher， Oliver Bascom. Oliver Bascom! He had to be a close relative of Mr. Peepers7 with a name like that! My girlfriends and I doubled over8 with laughter as we collaborated in conjuring up9 visions of a short， bald， skinny， prune10 -faced Caspar Milquetoast wearing horn rimmed glasses and plaid11 pants. The situation wasn’t really funny because we were going to have to endure this man for the entire year. As we lethargically12 made our way to class， each of us determined silently to find a seat as far back in the room as possible.

We arrived just before the tardy13 bell， opened the door and there， in front of the blackboard， descended directly from Mount Olympus， stood Adonis. He was tall and young and handsome and had the classic chiseled14 features of a Greek statue.

What ensued15 was sheer pandemonium16， a melee17 of seventeen-year-old girls， flying elbows and feet， scrambling18 to get to seats in the front of the room. With my long legs and arms， I managed to secure the front row center desk.

I was desperate to make a good impression on my new teacher， but kept quiet because I didn’t have anything interesting to say. The day that directions were given for our first major writing assignment， I arrived late to class. A friend later gave me the guidelines and I thought I understood them. I worked the entire weekend on the essay， turned it in on time and waited anxiously for Mr. Bascom’s evaluation.

After three or four days， he arrived in class bearing a stack of the corrected papers， which he put on the desk in two piles.

“I’ve selected the ten best essays for class comment and discussion，” he said.

Twenty minutes later， my heart sank when he got to the last composition in the pile and I realized that mine had not made the top ten. Oh， where to hide? Why had I ever chosen the most exposed desk in the room?

“These are all outstanding efforts，” Mr. Bascom continued，“however， I am now going to read you the most successful of all， a composition which is completely different from the rest and which is remarkable for its originality and creativity.” He pulled a paper out of his briefcase and began to read. We all dropped our jaws19 as it dawned on20 us that I was the author of this unusual work. I never told anyone that the reason my composition was so different was because I had totally misunderstood the assignment. Nevertheless， a different girl walked out of the classroom that day. I knew that I had a new set of standards to live up to21 and that anything was possible in the future. On my way to my next class， I could actually feel my spine22 stretch as I raised my head and straightened my shoulders.

我是怎么長這么高的還真是個謎。不過，從很小的時候起，我就學會了怎樣應對自己的個頭問題，那就是盡量讓自己不起眼。在學校里，我穿色調灰暗的衣服和低跟鞋。我總挑教室后排的位子坐，在課堂上也從不舉手發言。低頭垂肩，我幾乎就這樣度過了整個初中時代。

16歲時，我家搬到了一個小鎮上。雖然仍會因自己的身高感到局促不安，我在新學校里相對還是比較開心的。我們的老師都很關心我們，對工作也很認真負責。我尤其喜歡英語老師“老姑娘”，因為她愛講希臘神話，總會在為我們朗誦詩歌時掉眼淚。然而，在我升入高三的第一天，校園里大家都在私底下傳著一條消息——那位“老姑娘”已經離開學校去結婚了，我們將會有一位新的英語老師，名叫奧利弗·巴斯科姆。

奧利弗·巴斯科姆！竟然叫這樣的名字，他一定是令人捧腹的皮伯斯先生的近親吧！我和女友們一起幻想這個人的樣子：身材矮小、腦門謝頂、瘦骨嶙峋、長著一張西梅干似的皺巴巴的臉，活脫脫一個戴著角質邊框眼鏡、身穿格子褲的卡斯珀·米爾克托斯特(譯者注：H·T·韋伯斯特在其連環漫畫《膽小鬼》中所塑造的人物，天性溫順、敏感、膽小懦弱、猶豫不決，常被人輕視)。想到這兒，我們都笑彎了腰。其實這種狀況并不好笑，因為這一整年我們都將忍受這樣一個人來上課。我們沒精打采地走向教室時，每個人都在心中默默地決定找盡可能靠后的座位坐。

我們走到門口，姍姍來遲的上課鈴聲恰好響起。推開教室門，我們看到黑板前面站著從奧林匹斯山下凡而來的 “阿多尼斯”(譯者注：希臘神話中的美男子)。他高大、年輕、英俊，有著希臘雕塑般精雕細琢的味道。

接下來教室里一片混亂，一群17歲的女孩展開混戰，手腳并用地爭奪著教室前排的座位。出于手長腿長的優勢，我成功地搶到了教室前排正中間的位置。

我極度渴望給新老師留下好印象，可因為沒什么有趣的事兒可講，只好緘口不言。有一天，新老師給我們布置了第一個重要的寫作任務，并說明了寫作要求，可我那天遲到了。一位朋友后來將寫作要求告訴了我，我當時還以為自己都懂了。我花了整個周末寫完這篇文章，并將它按時交了上去，接著焦急地等待著巴斯科姆老師的評價。

三四天之后，巴斯科姆老師帶著一摞改好的作業本走進教室，并把它們分成兩疊放在講桌上。

“我挑了十篇最好的文章供大家評論和討論。”他說。

20分鐘后，當他進行到那一疊中的最后一篇作文時，我意識到自己的文章并沒有進入前十名，我的心隨之沉到了谷底。哎，要去哪里躲起來呢？當初自己為什么要選擇坐在教室里最顯眼的座位上啊？

“這些文章都很出色，”巴斯科姆老師接著說道，“不過，我現在要給大家讀讀所有作文中最成功的一篇，它與其他作文完全不同，因其原創性和創意而顯得非同尋常。”他從公文包里拿出一篇作文，開始讀起來。當大家知道是我寫了這篇獨特的作文時，個個驚訝得不得了。

我從未告訴過任何人，我的作文之所以如此與眾不同，是因為我當時完全把作業要求理解錯了。不過在那一天，一個女孩子以嶄新的面貌走出了教室。我知道自己有了一套新的準則可以踐行，而且一切皆有可能在未來實現。在去往下一節課的路上，我昂首挺胸，真正感覺到自己直起了腰板。

注釋

1. cope with: 對付，(成功地)應對

2. drab adj. 色彩暗淡的

3. stooped adj. 頭和肩習慣性前傾的

4. slouch vi. 低頭垂肩地站(或坐、走)

5. conscientious adj. 認真的；勤勤懇懇的

6. abuzz adj. 嗡嗡響的，嘈雜的

7. Mr. Peepers: 皮伯斯先生，美國20世紀50年代同名情景喜劇中的人物，是一位初中科學教師，言行笨拙，引人發笑，常使自己落入尷尬境地。

8. double over: (使) (因劇痛或大笑等而)彎著身子

9. conjure up: 想出，設想

10. prune n. 李子干，西梅干

11. plaid adj. 有格子圖案的

12. lethargically adv. 沒精打采地；昏睡地 13. tardy adj. 行動緩慢的

14. chisel vt. 鑿，雕

15. ensue vi. 接著發生

16. pandemonium n. 喧鬧；大混亂

17. melee n. 混戰，大打出手

18. scramble vi. (亂糟糟地)爭奪

19. drop one’s jaw: 大吃一驚

20. dawn on: 被想到；被領悟

21. live up to: 實踐(諾言、原則等)

22. spine n. 【解】脊柱，脊椎