幸運的套鞋(四)

IV A GREAT MOMENT， A VERY UNUSUAL JOURNEY

Every one who belongs to Copenhagen knows the look of the entrance to the Frederick's Hospital in Copenhagen; but as， perhaps， a few will read this story who do not belong to Copenhagen， it becomes necessary to give a short description of it.

The hospital is separated from the street by a tolerably high railing， in which the thick iron rails stand so far apart， that certain very thin inmates are said to have squeezed between them， and thus paid their little visits outside the premises. The part of the body most difficult to get through was the head; and here， as it often happens in the world， small heads were the most fortunate. This will be sufficient as an introduction.

One of the young volunteers， of whom one could only say in one sense that he had a great head， had the watch that evening. The rain was pouring down; but in spite of this obstacle he wanted to go out， only for a quarter of an hour. It was needless， he thought， to tell the porter of his wish， especially if he could slip through between the rails. There lay the goloshes which the watchman had forgotten. It never occurred to him in the least that they were goloshes of Fortune. They would do him very good service in this rainy weather， and he pulled them on. Now the question was whether he could squeeze through the bars; till now he had never tried it. There he stood.

\"I wish to goodness I had my head outside!\" cried he. And immediately， though his head was very thick and big， it glided easily and quickly through. The goloshes must have understood it well; but now the body was to slip through also， and that could not be done.

\"I'm too fat，\" said he.\"I thought my head would be the worst thing. I shan't get through.\"

Now he wanted to pull his head back quickly， but he could not manage it; he could move his neck， but that was all. His first feeling was one of anger， and then his spirits sank down to zero. The goloshes of Fortune had placed him in this terrible condition， and， unfortunately， it never occurred to him to wish himself free. No: instead of wishing， he only strove， and could not stir from the spot.

The rain poured down; not a creature was to be seen in the street; he could not reach the gate-bell， and how was he to get loose? He foresaw that he would have to remain here until the morning， and then they would have to send for a blacksmith， to file through the iron bars. But such a business is not to be done quickly. The whole charity school opposite would be upon its legs; the whole sailors' quarter close by would come up and see him standing in the pillory; and a fine crowd there would be.

\"Ugh!\"he cried， \"the blood's rising to my head，and I shall go mad!Yes， I'm going mad! O I wish I were free again， then mostlikely it would pass over.\"

That's what he ought to have said a littlesooner.The very moment he had uttered the thought his head was free; and now he rushed in， quite dazed with the fright the goloshes of Fortune had given him. But we must not think the whole affair was over; there was much worse to come yet.

The night passed away， and the following day too， and nobody sent for the goloshes. In the evening a representation was to take place in an amateur theatre in a distant street. The house was crammed; and among the audience was the volunteer from the hospital， who appeared to have forgotten his adventure of the previous evening. He had the goloshes on， for they had not been sent for; and as it was dirty in the streets， they might do him good service. A new piece was recited; it was called My Aunt's Spectacles. These were spectacles which， when any one put them on in a great assembly of people， made all present look like cards， so that one could prophesy from them all that would happen in the coming year.

The idea struck him; he would have liked to possess such a pair of spectacles. If they were used rightly， they would enable the wearer to look into people's hearts; and that， he thought， would be more interesting than to see what was going to happen in the next year; for future events would be known in time， but the people's thoughts never.

\"Now I'll look at the row of ladies and gentlemen on the first bench; if one could look directly into their hearts! Yes， that must be a hollow， a sort of shop. How my eyes would wander about in that shop!

In every lady's， yonder， I should doubtless find a great milliner's warehouse; with this one here the shop is empty， but it would do no harm to have it cleaned out. But there would also be substantial shops. Ah， yes?\" he continued， sighing， \"1 know one in which all the goods are first-rate， but there's a shopman in it already; that's the only drawback in the whole shop? From one and another the word would be 'Please to step in! ' Oh that I might only step in， like a neat little thought， and slip through their hearts?'

That was the word of command for the goloshes. The volunteer shrivelled up， and began to take a very remarkable journey through the hearts of the first row of spectators. The first heart through which he passed was that of a lady; but he immediately fancied himself in the Orthopaedic Institute， in the room where the plaster casts of deformed limbs are kept hanging against the walls; the only difference was， that these casts were formed in the institute when the patients came in， but here in the heart they were formed and preserved after the good persons had gone away. For they were casts of female friends， whose bodily and mental fauns were preserved here.

Quickly he had passed into another female heart. But this seemed to him like a great holy church; the white dove of innocence fluttered over the high altar. Gladly would he have sunk down on his knees; but he was obliged to go away into the next heart. Still， however， he heard the tones of the organ， and it seemed to him that he himself had become another and a better man. He felt himself not unworthy to enter into the next sanctuary， which showed itself in the form of a poor garret， containing a sick mother. But through the window the warm sun streamed in， beautiful roses nodded from the little wooden box on the roof， and two sky-blue birds sang full of childlike joy， while the sick mother prayed for a blessing on her daughter.

Now he crept on his hands and knees through an overfilled butcher's shop. There was meat， and nothing but meat， wherever he went. It was the heart of a rich respectable man， whose name is certainly to be found in the directory.

Now he was in the heart of this man's wife: this heart was an old dilapidated pigeon-house. The husband's portrait was used as a mere weathercock: it stood in connection with the doors， and these doors opened and shut according as the husband turned.

Then he came into a cabinet of mirrors， such as we find in the castle of Rosenborg; but the mirrors magnified in a great degree. In the middle of the floor sat， like a Grand Lama， the insignificant I of the proprietor， astonished in the contemplation of his own greatness.

Then he fancied himself transported into a narrow needle-case full of pointed needles; and he thought， \"This must decidedly be the heart of an old maid!\" But that was not the case. It was a young officer， wearing several orders， and of whom one said， \"He's a man of intellect and heart.\"

Quite confused was the poor volunteer when he emerged from the heart of the last person in the first row. He could not arrange his thoughts， and fancied it must be his powerful imagination which had run away with him.

\"Gracious powers!\" he sighed， \"I must certainly have a great tendency to go mad. It is also unconscionably hot in here， the blood is rising to my head!\"

And now he remembered the great event of the last evening， how his head had been caught between the iron rails of the hospital.

\"That's where I must have caught it，\" thought he.\"I must do something at once. A Russian bath might be very good. I wish I were already lying on the highest board in the bath-house.\"

And there he lay on the highest board in the vapour bath; but he was lying there in all his clothes， in boots and goloshes， and the hot drops from the ceiling， were falling on his face.

\"Hi!\" he cried， and jumped down to take a plunge bath.

The attendant uttered a loud cry on seeing a person there with all his clothes on. The volunteer had， however， enough presence of mind to whisper to him， \"It's for a wager!\" But the first thing he did when he got into his own room was to put a big blister on the nape of his neck， and another on his back， that they might draw out his madness.

Next morning he had a very sore back; and that was all he had got by the goloshes of Fortune.

(To be continued)

4偉大的一刻，一次不平常的旅行

哥本哈根的每個市民，都知道該市弗雷德里克醫(yī)院的入口處的外觀。不過可能有些讀這個故事的人不住在哥本哈根，所以有必要簡單地描述一下。

醫(yī)院和街道是用比較高的柵欄隔開的。這些粗鐵欄桿之間相隔很大，據(jù)說有些很瘦的住院病人可以從兩根欄桿之間穿過，好到外面去溜達一會兒。身體最難穿過的地方是頭，這樣的話小腦袋就占便宜了，這在世上是很常見的事兒。介紹就到此打住吧。

有個年輕的實習(xí)醫(yī)生，你一看見他，就會發(fā)覺他腦袋特別大。今天晚上他剛好值班。外面下起了傾盆大雨。但盡管如此，他還是想出去，溜達一刻鐘就回來。他想，這事不必驚動門衛(wèi)，特別是他覺得自己好像能夠鉆過欄桿，報告門衛(wèi)就更顯得多余了。守夜人落下的套鞋就放在他旁邊。他怎么也不會想到，這是一雙幸運套鞋。在這個雨天里，穿上這雙套鞋正合適，于是他就套在自己的腳上。現(xiàn)在的問題是，自己能不能從欄桿中間擠過去，因為到目前為止他還沒試過呢。他站在欄桿旁。

“讓老天保佑我的腦袋能鉆出去!”他大叫道。轉(zhuǎn)眼間，他輕而易舉地就把頭鉆了過去，盡管他的腦袋又肥又大。套鞋一定知道他的愿望了吧。但身子還得鉆過去，可他怎么也做不到。

“我太胖，”他說，“我還以為自己的腦袋是最糟的，現(xiàn)在身體卻過不去。”

這時他想把腦袋迅速地收回來，但他也做不到。他動了動脖子，但這是他唯一可以做的了。他第一個感覺是很氣憤，然后心情落到了最低點。是幸運套鞋把他弄成這個樣子的。不幸的是，他從來沒有發(fā)愿讓自己解脫出來。不，他沒有發(fā)愿，反而一個勁地掙扎，所以他怎么也動不了。

雨還在嘩啦啦地下著，街道上空空蕩蕩的。他夠不到門鈴，所以也沒有辦法喊人將他解脫出來。他擔(dān)心自己不得不呆在這兒，一直到明天早晨。那時人們就會叫一個鐵匠來，把鐵柵欄打斷。但這也不是輕而易舉就能完成的，對面教會學(xué)校的學(xué)生一定會伸頭看熱鬧；附近海員宿舍的居民們肯定會過來，欣賞他關(guān)在柵欄的形象。反正這兒肯定會圍上一大群人的。

“唉!”他叫道，“我的血直往上涌，我肯定是要瘋了!是的，我快發(fā)瘋了!噢，我真希望自己能解脫出來，那樣的話我就不會變瘋了!”

他早就該說出這個愿望了。他的話剛出口，腦袋就鉆過去了。他撒腿就跑，幸運的套鞋給他帶來的恐懼把他給搞暈了。但我們別以為事情就這樣收場，更糟的事還在后頭呢。

晚上過去了，第二天白天也平安無事，沒有人來尋找套鞋。晚上，在一條偏遠的街道的業(yè)余劇場，正在舉辦一場演出。大廳里擠滿了人，觀眾中就有那個來自醫(yī)院的實習(xí)醫(yī)生，他似乎已經(jīng)把頭天晚上發(fā)生的事兒給忘了。他還穿著那雙套鞋，因為沒有人來找這雙鞋。街道上很臟，這雙套鞋正派上用場。有人朗頌一首新詩，題目叫“姑媽的眼鏡”。誰要在一大群人面前戴上這副眼鏡，就會覺得自己面前都是算命的紙牌，可以預(yù)測來年發(fā)生的事情。

這深深地觸動了他，他非常想要這樣一副眼鏡。如果使用得當，戴這幅眼鏡的人就能看透別人的內(nèi)心。他想，這可比預(yù)測來年發(fā)生的事要有趣多了。因為未來的事情只需要等一等就會清楚，但人們的思想別人卻怎么也看不透。

“現(xiàn)在我要看看坐在第一排的女士和先生們，能看透他們的心思該多好!是的，那肯定是個洞，或者是商店之類的東西。我一定會在這個商店里大飽眼福的。”

“在那兒坐著的每一位女士的心里，我都必定會發(fā)現(xiàn)一個女帽商店。這位女士的商店里是空空的，但清理干凈也沒有什么壞處。但肯定會有琳瑯滿目的店鋪。噢，一定會的!”他繼續(xù)沉思著，嘆了口氣。“我知道其中有個店所有商品都是一流的，但里面已經(jīng)有個男店員了，這是該商店的唯一缺點!所有的商品都寫著‘歡迎光臨!’我只管進去就行了，就像一個小小的念頭那樣鉆進她們心里。”

套鞋馬上就接收了這個指令。實習(xí)醫(yī)生縮得小小的，開始在第一排觀眾心里做一次不同尋常的旅行。他首先鉆進的是一位女士的心里，他馬上覺得自己走進了一個矯形診所，在病房的墻上，掛著許多變形四肢的石膏模型。唯一不同的是，在診所里，這些東西是病人入院后才做出來的。而在這位女士的心里，這是在好端端的人走了以后，才造出來并保留在那里的。這是她的女友們的模型，她們生理上和心理上的缺陷都保留在這兒。

他很快走進另一個女士的心里。這兒像一個神圣的大教堂，圣潔的白鴿飛翔在高高的神龕上。他誠心誠意地跪了下來。但很快他又不得不離開，進入下一個人的心里。不過他仍然能聽到教堂的琴聲，他覺得自己變成了一個更善良的另一個人。他不覺得自己沒有資格走進下一個圣地，它看起來像個破舊的閣樓，里面住著一個生病的母親。溫暖的陽光通過窗戶照進來，屋頂上小木箱邊漂亮的玫瑰花向他點頭致意，兩只天藍色的鳥兒像孩子般快樂地歌唱著，生病的老母親這時正在為自己的女兒祈禱呢。

然后，他爬過一個屠夫的滿當當?shù)牡赇仭Ｄ莾旱教幨侨猓吡艘煌ǎ吹降娜侨狻＿@是一個富有的紳士的心臟，他的名字在名人錄上你可以查到。

現(xiàn)在他進入了這個紳士的老婆的心里，這個心房是個破舊的鴿子籠。丈夫的畫像只被用作一個風(fēng)向標。它貼在門上，門隨著丈夫的轉(zhuǎn)動，時而開著，時而關(guān)閉。

然后他步入了一個鏡子房，就像我們在盧森堡宮殿里看到的那樣。但這兒的鏡子把東西照得很大。在地面中央，有一個主人“我”坐在那兒，姿態(tài)就像達賴喇嘛一樣，為自己的偉大而感到躊躕滿志。

然后，他覺得自己穿進了一個窄小的針盒子，里面全是尖尖的針。他想：“這肯定是個老處女的心吧！”其實不然，這是一位年輕軍官的心，他身上佩戴好幾個勛章，人們說：“他是個聰明的好心人。”

這個可憐的實習(xí)醫(yī)生從第一排的最后一個人心中鉆出來的時候，感到迷惑不解。他理不清自己的思路，還以為是自己的胡思亂想在作怪呢。

“我的天！”他嘆道，“我肯定是快瘋了。這兒熱得讓人頭昏，血直往我頭上涌！”

這時他記起頭天晚上發(fā)生的事，他的腦袋曾被卡在醫(yī)院的兩個鐵欄桿之間。

“我就是在那里搞得頭疼的，”他想，“我得想辦法治冶。洗個俄式熱水澡大有好處，我真希望自己現(xiàn)在就躺在浴室的最上層木板上。”

于是他就躺在了蒸汽浴室的最上層木板上了。但他是穿著衣服、皮靴和套鞋躺在上面的。從浴室頂上落下的熱水滴，打在他的臉上。

“嘿！”他大叫一聲，跳下去大洗一番。

服務(wù)生看到一個衣冠楚楚地人跳進水池，禁不住尖叫起來。實習(xí)醫(yī)生頭腦倒是蠻清醒地，他悄悄地對服務(wù)生說：“我這是在和別人打賭！”不過他回到自己的房間時，做的第一件事就是在脖子上、背上各貼了一大塊膏藥，好吸掉他的瘋狂念頭。

第二天一早，他背疼得很厲害，這都是那“幸運套鞋”惹的禍。

（未完待續(xù)）