迷你幽默

Sorry， No Change Here

A friend and I were standing in line at a fast-food restaurant， waiting to place our order. There was a big sign posted. “No bills larger than $20 will be accepted.”

The woman in front of us， pointing to the sign， remarked， “Believe me， if I had a bill larger than $20， I wouldn’t be eating here.”

對不起，本店不找零錢

我和一個朋友在快餐店排隊訂餐，那里很醒目地寫著，不接受超過20美元的大鈔(請自備零錢)。

我們前邊的一位女士指著這個牌子對我們說:“上帝保佑，如果我身上有超過20美元的話，我一定不會在這兒吃飯!”

Beware of Dog!

As a stranger entered a little country store， he noticed a sign warning， “Danger!Beware of dog!” posted on the glass door. Inside， he noticed a harmless old hound dog asleep on the floor beside the cash register. “Is that the dog folks are supposed to beware of?” he asked the owner. “Yes， that’s him，” came the reply. The stranger couldn’t help but being amused. “That certainly doesn’t look like a dangerous dog to me. Why in the world would you post that sign?” “Because，” the owner explained， “before I posted that sign， people kept tripping him over!”

小心有狗!

一名陌生人走進一家鄉間小商店，看到玻璃門上貼的一個告示牌上寫著，“危險! 小心有狗!”進去后，他看到一條樣子一點都不兇的老狗趴在收款機旁邊的地板上睡覺。“這就是大伙都得留神的那只狗嗎?”陌生人問店主。“是，就是他”，店主回答。 聽到這個回答， 陌生人覺得很好笑。“我覺得那條狗一點都不可怕。你貼那個告示做什么?”“因為，” 店主解釋說，“在我貼告示之前， 大伙老被他絆倒。”

Things Have Been Okay

A young couple were becoming anxious about their four-year-old son， who had not yet talked. They took him to specialists， but the doctors found nothing wrong with him. Then one morning at breakfast the boy suddenly blurted， “Mom， the toast is burned.”

“You talked! You talked!” shouted his mother. “I’m so happy! But why has it taken this long?”

“Well， up till now，” said the boy， “things have been okay.”

一切都正常

一對年輕夫婦有個兒子，已經四歲了，還沒有開口說話，他們對此深感焦慮。他們帶他去找專家診治，但醫生們總覺得他沒有毛病。后來有一天早上吃早餐時，那孩子突然開口了:“媽媽，面包烤焦了。”

“你說話了!你說話了!”他母親叫了起來。“我太高興了!但為什么花了這么長的時間呢?”

“哦，在這之前，”那男孩說，“一切都很正常。”

I’m Glad

A teacher was telling her pupils the importance of making others glad. “Now， children，” she said， “has anyone of you ever made someone else glad?”

“Please， teacher，” said a small boy， “I’ve made someone glad yesterday.”

“Well done. Who was that?”

“My granny.”

“Good boy. Now tell us how you made your grandmother glad.”

“Please， teacher， I went to see her yesterday， and stayed with her for three hours. Then I said to her， ‘Granny， I’m going home，’ and she said， ‘Well， I’m glad!’”

我很高興

一個教師正在對學生講使別人高興的重要性。“聽著，孩子們，”她說，“你們當中有誰曾讓別人高興過嗎?”

“我，老師，”一個小男孩說，“昨天我就使別人高興過。”

“做得好，是誰呢?”

“我奶奶。”

“好孩子。現在告訴我們，你是怎樣使你奶奶高興的?”

“是這樣的，老師。昨天我去看她，在她那兒呆了三個小時。然后我對她說‘奶奶，我要回家了。……