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健全的人生

2008-12-31 00:00:00卡卡編
文化月刊·遺產 2008年10期

Onc, a circle missed a wedge. The circle wanted to be whole, so it went around looking for its missing piece. But because it was incomplete and therefore could roll only very slowly, it admired the flowers along the way. It chatted with worms. It enjoyed the sunshine. It found lots of different pieces, but none of them fit. So it left them all by the side of the road and kept on searching. Then one day the circle found a piece that fit perfectly. It was so happy. Now it could be whole, with nothing missing. It incorporated the missing piece into itself and began to roll. Now that it was a perfect circle, it could roll very fast, too fast to notice flowers or talk to the worms. When it realized how different the world seemed when it rolled so quickly, it stopped, left its found piece by the side of the road and rolled slowly away.

The lesson of the story, I suggested, was that in some strange sense we are more whole when we are missing something. The man who has everything is in some ways a poor man. He will never know what it feels like to yearn, to hope, to nourish his soul with the dream of something better. He will never know the experience of having someone who loves him give him to something he has always wanted or never had.

There is a wholeness about the person who has come to terms with his limitations, who has been brave enough to let go of his unrealistic dreams and not feel like a failure for doing so. There is a wholeness about the man or woman who has learned that he or she is strong enough to go through a tragedy and survive, she can lose someone and still feel like a complete person.

Life is not a trap set for us by God, so that he can condemn us for failing. Life is not a spelling bee, where no matter how many words you've gotten right; you're disqualified if you make one mistake. Life is more like a baseball season, where even the best team loses one third of its games and even the worst team has its days of brilliance. Our goal is to win more games than we lose.

When we accept that imperfection is part of being human, and when we can continue rolling through life and appreciate it, we will have achieved a wholeness that others can only aspire to. That, I believe, is what God asks of us -- not 揃e perfect?, not 揇on抰 even make a mistake? but 揃e whole.?

If we are brave enough to love, strong enough to forgive, generous enough to rejoice in another's happiness, and wise enough to know there is enough love to go around for us all, then we can achieve a fulfillment that no other living creature will ever know.

從前,一只圓圈缺了一塊楔子。它想保持完整,便四處尋找那塊楔子。由于不完整,所以它只能慢慢地滾動。一路上,它對花兒露出羨慕之色。它與蠕蟲談天侃地。它還欣賞到了陽光之美。圓圈找到了許多不同的楔子,但沒有一件與它相配。所以,它將它們統統棄置路旁,繼續尋覓。終于有一天,它找到了一個完美的配件。圓圈是那樣地高興,現在它可以說是完美無缺了。它裝好配件,并開始滾動起來。現在它已成了一個完美的圓圈,所以滾動得非常快,以至于難以觀賞花兒,也無暇與蠕蟲傾訴心聲。當圓圈意識到因快奔急騁使它失去了原有的世界時,它不禁停了下來,將找到的配件棄置路旁,又開始慢慢地滾動。

我覺得這個故事告訴我們,從某種奇妙的意義上講,當我們失去了一些東西時反而更加完整。一個擁有一切的人其實在某些方面是個窮人。他永遠也體會不到什么是渴望、期待及如何用美好夢想滋養自己的靈魂。他也永遠不會有這樣一種體驗:一個愛他的人送給他某種他夢寐以求的或者從未擁有過的東西意味著什么。

人生的完整性在于知道如何面對缺陷,如何勇敢地摒棄不現實的幻想而又不以此為缺憾。人生的完整性還在于學會勇敢面對人生悲劇而繼續生存,能夠在失去親人后依然表現出完整的個人風范。

人生不是上帝為譴責我們的缺陷而給我們布下的陷阱。人生也不是一場拼字游戲比賽,不管你拼出多少單詞,一旦出現了一個錯誤,你便前功盡棄。人生更像是一個棒球賽季,即使最好的球隊也會輸掉1/3的比賽,而最差的球隊也有春風得意的日子。我們的目標就是多贏球,少輸球。 當我們接受不完整性是人類本性的一部分時,當我們不斷地進行人生滾動并能欣賞其價值時,我們就會獲得其他人僅能渴望的完整人生。我相信這就是上帝對我們的要求:不求“完美”,也不求“永不犯錯”,而是求得人生的“完整”。

如果我們能夠勇敢地去愛,堅強地去寬容,大度地去為別人的快樂而高興,明智地理解身邊充滿愛,那么我們就能取得別的生物所不能取得的成就。

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