Goodbye, Little En

This novel by Xu Lu strings together a moving story from the perspective of the teenager Xu Yanze. Xu Yanze had to drop out of school due to his impoverished family and returned to the countryside to work to earn his tuition. He was assigned to the elder brother and lived with the elder brother and his adopted daughter. Although the elder brother is uneducated， he taught him many principles of life. In order for Xu Yanze to go to school， the uncle in the village took him into the city to sell baked white potatoes， and while earning money， he also gained knowledge. By showing Xu Yanze’s inspirational story of learning to change his fate， the book depicts a touching teacher-student relationship， classmate love， and hometown friendship in difficult years. It eulogizes the brilliance of human nature and the spirit of never giving up， and vividly describes the struggles to survive and mental journey of local teenagers in such a special era.

Although I was only fifteen years old， the hard days and cold world had turned me into an astute， mature， and vigorous young man. Especially since I had started junior high school， I felt that my body was growing strong as quickly as my height was increasing， and what’s more， I was getting some strange ideas. Perhaps it’s an exaggeration， but I felt that my heart was filled with so many fantasies and ambitions， and that they stirred within me a relentless passion for life.

At that time， I had a line of poetry stuck on my desk. I had written it with a writing brush and decorated it around the edges. It read， “I am fully confident a man can swim three thousand miles in his two hundred years of life.” This was said to be Chairman Mao’s motto in his student days.

The start of another famous quote， this time from the Soviet writer Nikolai Ostrovsky， adorned the title page of my notebook: “A person’s life should be spent this way...”

My body was filled with the blood of a poor country boy. Hunger and a humble life had made me mature early， and made me sensitive to and competitive in everything. The days of sorrow， loneliness and misfortune made me appear full of rebellious and unyielding emotions toward the entire world. I seemed to have understood from a very young age that people grow up in constant resistance of their surroundings.

I still remember the annual 50 kilometer training march that my school had held. In the middle of the night， the students who boarded at school would spread the training order through the villages. Whatever the weather， we would obey the order so as not to embarrass our classmates， and even if there were blisters on our feet， we would never complain.

After I had left school and returned to Beixiao’e to work， I’d follow in the footsteps of Big Brother， a man of few words， learning to herd and becoming a little shepherd， exiled from human civilization. I wandered in the wilderness， driving those wordless sheep and cattle. I called out from the high and cloud-shrouded mountain tops. I ran through storms as rough as an overwhelming sea... The boundless wilderness of Daqing Mountain lay beneath my feet.

As I ran， wildly and aimlessly， I would shout aloud， as if I had merged with the wind， rain， thunder and lightning. The voices of all things on earth were the voice of my life. My whole body was full of strength and courage...

Not long after the fall crops had been harvested， Uncle Lihuai installed a tin stove.

I impressed the need for safety upon Little Xue， saying， “Little Xue， I’m leaving to go sell sweet potatoes in the county town， you must be obedient at home!”

In return， she told me， “Don’t spend too much time outside， Brother Ze， and don’t be too hard on yourself. Make sure you eat regularly and take care of your health!”

“There’s no need to worry. Uncle Lihuai will take care of me.”

I then turned to Big Brother， and told him， “I’ll be off now. It’s starting to get cold， you should try to walk less in the snow， so your legs don’t get frostbite again.”

“Don’t worry about me， just keep yourself safe while you’re away!”

“I’ll be fine.” I reassured him.

A few days later， we had prepared what we needed: a small wheelbarrow， laden with a heavy iron stove and coal briquettes on one side， and two sacks of raw， red-skinned sweet potatoes on the other， with two quilts wedged in the middle. At daybreak， we set off on our way， Uncle pushing it along while I pulled it with a rope， crushing the ice as we went.

We walked down the windswept， snowy road for dozens of miles. The streetlights were already lit by the time we reached the county town. Uncle Lihuai was wheezing， and the jacket I wore inside my ragged padded coat was soaked with sweat and steam rose from my head.

At that time， the town was not as crowded as it is now， and the buildings were not as tall as today. We found an intersection on Rongcheng Road with many passers-by， unloaded our cart， and set up our stove.

Uncle Lihuai said: “Little Ze， there are many officials here， and sweet potatoes are rare and expensive. Let’s heat up the stove now to avoid another night of freezing cold， and we can start early tomorrow morning. The town will be woken up by the enticing smell of our roasted sweet potatoes!”

Uncle Lihuai had me sleep next to the stove. Covered in his shabby quilt， he squatted in the corner of the walls， looking at the fire as he puffed on his pipe.

As I looked at his flickering pipe， I said to myself， “Please let me earn enough money for next year’s tuition!”

Xu Lu

The author， Xu Lu， is a children’s literature writer， poet， and essayist. He is a member of the Children’s Literature Committee of the China Writers Association， and vice chairman of the 5th and 6th Hubei Writers Association.