2023年12月大學英語四、六級作文試題評析（三）

四級

Directions： Suppose the university newspaper is inviting submissions from the students for its coming edition on the recent developments in their hometown. You are now to write an essay for submission. You will have 30 minutes to write the essay. You should write at least 120 words but no more than 180 words.

這道大學英語四級作文試題假設大學校報邀請學生投稿，內容是自己家鄉最近的發展變化。由于題目中developments用的是復數形式，所以考生可以寫家鄉的各種最新發展變化。

這篇作文可以寫三段。

第一段先指出自己在一個叫野豬坪的村子里出生和長大。這個村子位于湘西的大山里，千百年來一直與世隔絕，但是近幾年卻見證了巨大的變化。這樣我們就引出了本文的話題。

第二段詳細介紹自己家鄉的各種發展變化，我們不妨從以下幾個方面展開。首先，村里建起了一座新的醫療保健中心，呵護村民的健康。過去村里只有一家設備簡陋的診所。村民生了大病，經常會錯過最佳治療時機。其次，自從建了幾家手工藝品廠，當地的就業機會增加了，越來越多的村民選擇在自己家附近就業。最受歡迎的變化或許要數新建了一條雙車道公路并開通了公交，把我們村與最近的鎮子連接了起來，小孩再也不用步行上學。

第三段先指出自己家鄉的各種變化令人激動、鼓舞人心，然后表明自己志愿在大學畢業后努力把家鄉建設得更加美好。

下面請看參考范文：

I was born and bred in a small village called Yezhuping. For centuries， the village has lain undisturbed in the mountains of western Hunan. But in recent years it has witnessed dramatic changes.

A new health center has been built to take care of the villagers. In the past， there was only a poorly equipped clinic in my village. When they had a serious disease， villagers often missed the best opportunity for initial treatment. Another change is that there have been more local job opportunities since the foundation of several handicraft factories. An increasing number of people choose to work near their homes. Perhaps the most welcome development is that a two-lane highway has been built and a bus service has been put into operation， connecting my village to the nearest town. Children no longer need to go to school on foot.

The recent developments in my hometown are exciting and encouraging. I hope to join the effort to make it an even better place after my graduation from college. （170 words）

語言亮點借鑒：

1. I was born and bred in a small village called Yezhuping. 我在一個叫野豬坪的村子里出生和長大。be born and bred in 在……出生和長大。

2. For centuries， the village has lain undisturbed in the mountains of western Hunan. 這個村莊位于湘西的大山里，千百年來一直與世隔絕。lie 處于（某種狀態）。

3. But in recent years it has witnessed dramatic changes. 但是近年來它卻見證了巨大的變化。witness 見證。作此義時，句子的主語一般是某段時間或某個地點。

4. Perhaps the most welcome development is that a two-lane highway has been built and a bus service has been put into operation， connecting my village to the nearest town. 最受歡迎的發展變化或許是建了一條雙車道公路，公交也已投入運營，把我們村與最近的鎮子連接了起來。connecting 是現在分詞作狀語，表示結果。

六級

Directions： For this part， you are allowed 30 minutes to write an essay that begins with the sentence “Nowadays parents are increasingly aware that allowing kids more freedom to explore and learn on their own helps foster their independence and boost their confidence.” You can make comments， cite examples or use your personal experiences to develop your essay. You should write at least 150 words but no more than 200 words （not including the sentence given）.

這道大學英語六級作文試題屬于闡釋觀點型。此類型題目的特點是提出一個觀點，要求考生論證這個觀點的正確性。這道題指出，如今家長越來越意識到給予孩子更多獨立探索和學習的自由有助于培養他們的獨立性并增強他們的自信心。這道作文試題有點長，我們在審題時要善于簡化題目、抓住關鍵。這道題的關鍵是論證為什么應該給予孩子更多獨立探索和學習的自由。

本文可以寫三段。

第一段先指出如今家長越來越意識到給予孩子更多獨立探索和學習的自由有助于培養他們的獨立性并增強他們的自信心。然后引用約翰斯·霍普金斯大學的一項研究支持這一觀點。

第二段論述為什么應該給予孩子更多獨立探索和學習的自由。我們不妨緊扣題目，從有助于培養孩子的獨立性和增強孩子的自信心展開論證。首先，獨立探索的時候，孩子們能夠通過親身體驗學會把不同的經歷聯系起來并得出自己的結論，這自然有助于他們獨立思考。此外，在探索的過程中，孩子們必須憑借自己的本領解決遇到的挑戰，他們因此會變得更加自信。為了使論證更有說服力，我們不妨再從反面論證一下——缺乏探索機會的孩子經常表現得很不自信，不敢嘗試新事物。

本文可以用建議法結尾。第三段先總結上文，指出探索是孩子成長中一個至關重要的部分，孩子正是通過探索來增強自信心并形成對學習的終生熱愛。最后，我們水到渠成地建議家長支持孩子獨立地探索和學習。

下面請看參考范文：

Nowadays parents are increasingly aware that allowing kids more freedom to explore and learn on their own helps foster their independence and boost their confidence. A Johns Hopkins University study finds that parents who provide children with opportunities to explore and learn independently see positive changes in their children.

Allowing kids to explore and learn about things they’re interested in helps promote their independence and build their confidence， two requisites for their future success. As they explore， children learn firsthand to make connections between different experiences and arrive at their own conclusions. This naturally helps them to become independent thinkers. In addition， when they explore， children have to overcome challenges they encounter. In doing this， they will be more confident in their abilities. Conversely， children lacking opportunities to explore are often so unsure of themselves that they hardly dare to experiment with new things.

Exploring is a critical component of children’s development. It is through exploration that children increase their self-confidence and develop a lifelong love for learning. Therefore， parents should support their children in exploring and learning on their own. （181 words）

語言亮點借鑒：

1. Allowing kids to explore and learn about things they’re interested in helps promote their independence and build their confidence， two requisites for their future success. 讓孩子探索和學習自己感興趣的事物有助于提高他們的獨立性并增強他們的自信心——這是他們未來獲得成功的兩個必要條件。build confidence 使（信心或信任）逐漸增強。

2. In doing this， they will be more confident in their abilities. 在此過程中，他們會對自己的本領更加自信。in 在……方面。

3. Conversely， children lacking opportunities to explore are often so unsure of themselves that they hardly dare to experiment with new things. 相反，缺乏探索機會的孩子經常表現得很不自信，不敢嘗試新事物。conversely 相反地，反過來。這是作正反論證的一個常用過渡語。

4. It is through exploration that children increase their self-confidence and develop a lifelong love for learning. 孩子正是通過探索來增強自信心并形成對學習的終生熱愛。

* 上海外國語大學國際新聞碩士，講師，專注大學英語寫作教學十余年。