
本期點評名師
張超 男,河北省衡水市阜城縣第四中學高級英語教師、市優秀英語教師、縣骨干教師,從事英語教育教學工作29年;多年來,在省級以上報刊《中學生英語》《學英語》《英語周報》《中學生英語讀寫》《中學英語園地》《英語輔導》《校園英語》等發表文章數百篇,并有多篇論文獲獎;曾參編高中版教輔資料《天天向上》和《三維方案》的編寫工作,并榮獲“中央教育科學研究所全國基礎教育科研先進個人”榮譽稱號;多次輔導多名學生在省、市和國家級英語競賽中獲獎。
Hello, everyone!Im glad to tell you that I live in a happy and loving family.
Therere three people in my family. They are my father, my mother and I. My father and my mother love me so much. In the morning, my mother usually gets up early to make a① delicious breakfast for me. After breakfast, my father drives me to school if it rains and② snows. Every day, my mother helps washes③ my clothes. She is really a hard-working woman. Also, she reads interesting stories to me in the evening. Its very relaxed④. On weekends, my parents like taking a trip with me, because they want me to learn more and understand more. I enjoy the time with my parents. My dear father and mother, thank you for all you have done for me. I love you forever. I think I should do anything⑤ for my dear parents, too.
河北省阜城縣第四中學九(2)班 宋廣智
1. 優點:
在每個人的成長過程中,家人的陪伴很溫暖,尤其是父母的付出更讓人感到幸福。本文小作者以時間順序寫出了父母對自己的愛,簡單但是飽含溫情,無微不至。在文章結尾更體現了小作者對父母的感恩之心,使文章的內涵更加豐富。本文條理清楚,語言質樸,情感飽滿,溫馨感人,以小見大,文辭優美,值得借鑒。
2. 需要修改的地方:
① 去掉a。三餐的單詞前不用冠詞。
② and改為or。or在這里表示選擇的關系。
③ washes改為wash。help do指“幫助做某事”。
④ relaxed改為relaxing。relaxing意為“令人放松的”,用來形容事物。
⑤ anything改為something。anything用于疑問句和否定句,而something多用于肯定句。
3. 評分:
按中考英語作文滿分20分的評分標準,本文修改前可得17分。