10 Tips for Getting Along with Your College Roommate與室友相處十要訣

凱爾茜·琳恩·盧西爾

You may have grown up living with lots of siblings， or this may be your first time sharing your living space with someone else. While having a roommate inevitably has its challenges， it can also be a great part of your college experience.

Follow these ten tips to make sure you and your roommate keep things pleasant and supportive throughout the year （or even years！）.

1. Be clear about your expectations from the beginning

Do you know in advance that you hate it when someone hits the snooze button1 fifteen times every morning？ That you’re a neat freak？ That you need ten minutes to yourself before talking to anyone after you wake up？ Let your roommate know as soon as you can about your little quirks and preferences. It’s not fair to expect him or her to pick up on2 them right away， and communicating what you need is one of the best ways to eliminate problems before they become problems.

2. Address problems when they’re little

Is your roommate always forgetting her stuff for the shower， and taking yours？ Are your clothes being borrowed faster than you can wash them？ Addressing things that bug you while they’re still little can help your roommate be aware of something she may not otherwise know. And addressing little things is much easier than addressing them after they’ve become big.

3. Respect your roommate’s stuff

This may seem simple， but it’s probably one of the biggest reasons why roommates experience conflict. Don’t think he’ll mind if you borrow his cleats for a quick soccer game3？ For all you know， you just stepped over an uncrossable line. Don’t borrow， use， or take anything without getting permission first.

4. Be mindful of who you bring into your room—and how often

You may love having your study group into your room. But your roommate may not. Be mindful of how often you bring people over. If your roommate studies best in the quiet， and you study best in a group， can you alternate who hits4 the library and who gets the room？

5. Lock the door and windows

This may seem like it has nothing to do with roommate relationships， but how would you feel if your roommate’s laptop got stolen during the ten seconds it took you to run down the hall5？ Or vice versa？ Locking your door and windows is a critical part of keeping safe on campus.

6. Be friendly， without expecting to be best friends

Don’t go into6 your roommate relationship thinking that you are going to be best friends for the time you’re at school. It may happen， but expecting it sets both of you up for7 trouble. You should be friendly with your roommate but also make sure you have your own social circles.

7. Be open to new things

Your roommate may be from someplace you’ve never heard of. They may have a religion or lifestyle that is completely different from your own. Be open to new ideas and experiences， especially as it relates to what your roommate brings into your life. That’s why you went to college in the first place， right？！

8. Stay open to change

You should expect to learn and grow and change during your time at school. And the same should happen to your roommate， if all goes well. As the semester progresses， realize things will change for both of you. Be comfortable addressing things that unexpectedly come up， setting new rules， and being flexible to your changing environment.

9. Address problems when they’re big， too

You may not have been totally honest8 with tip #2， or you may suddenly find yourself with a roommate who goes wild9 after being shy and quiet the first two months. Either way， if something gets to be a big problem quickly， deal with it as soon as you can.

10. If nothing else， follow the golden rule

Treat your roommate like you’d like to be treated. No matter what your relationship is at the end of the year， you can take comfort knowing you acted like an adult and treated your roommate with respect.? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ■

可能你有許多兄弟姐妹，你們一起生活，一起長大。也可能這是你第一次跟別人同室起居。雖說與他人同住，總少不了這樣那樣的麻煩，但這會是你大學生活中一段極為重要的經歷。

想在同住的這一年甚至數年里，大家和睦互助，不妨試試下面的十個要訣。

1.“丑話”得要說在前

你事先知道自己討厭別人每天早上按掉15次鬧鈴還不起床嗎？知道自己有潔癖嗎？知道自己睡醒之后還得再過10分鐘才想開口說話嗎？這些小小怪癖和喜好都要盡早跟室友說明。想讓別人馬上就覺察到這些細節，未免強人所難。良策之一是坦誠相告，防患于未然。

2.及時化解小矛盾

同寢的姑娘洗澡時是不是經常忘記帶洗浴用品，拿你的來用？才洗好的衣服，是不是馬上又會被一件接一件地借走？煩心之事雖小，也要及時提醒，不然她可能還渾然不覺。小事說開了很容易化解，積怨成仇就不好辦了。

3.他人物品別亂動

這點看似簡單，可如果做不到，卻是室友間失和的主要原因之一。不過穿他的釘鞋去踢會兒球，他不會在意吧？你可要知道，你已經越過了一條不該逾越的界線。除非事先征得本人同意，否則不要借、用、拿室友的任何個人物品。

4.來客不可將人擾

也許你喜歡叫上學習小組的同學來寢室一起學習，可你的室友未必喜歡。注意：不要頻繁帶人進寢室。如果室友覺得安靜氛圍最利學習，而你學習時喜歡與人討論，你們不妨輪流使用寢室，一個人要用寢室，另一個人就去圖書館。

5.寢室門窗要鎖好

這點看似跟室友間相處得好與不好沒什么關系，可也許就是你去走廊打個轉的工夫、也就十秒鐘，室友的筆記本電腦就讓人偷走了，到那時你作何感想？如果這個丟東西的人換成是你，你又作何感想？在校園生活中，要保障人身財產安全，鎖好門窗可是至關重要的一環。

6.室友無須變摯友

不必費心費力地想把室友變成大學時期最好的朋友。雖然不是不可能，但期待過高只會給彼此帶來困擾。要與室友和睦相處，但也要有自己的社交圈子。

7.樂于接受新事物

也許你的室友從一個你聞所未聞的地方而來，你們的宗教信仰和生活方式可能完全不同。要以開放的心態看待新觀念、嘗試新事物，當這些是因你的室友而接觸到的時候，尤應如此。這不正是你上大學的初衷嗎？

8.勇于改變應萬變

大學期間，你要自我學習、自我成長、自我改變。如果一切順利的話，你的室友也應如此。要明白，隨著學期向前推進，大家都會有所改變。意料之外的事時有發生，要從容應對。要定新規，隨機應變。

9.矛盾升級得處理

也許你并沒有照著第二條要訣說的那樣去做，又或許，你突然發現，頭兩個月還靦腆文靜的室友原來是個暴脾氣——無論哪種情況，一旦事情有愈演愈烈的趨勢，要盡快處理。

10.黃金法則要記牢

你希望別人怎么對待你，你就怎么對待別人。待學年將盡，無論你們相交深淺，只要你展現出了成年人的氣度，給予了室友應有的尊重，那就可以安心了。? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ? ?□

（譯者為“《英語世界》杯”翻譯大賽獲獎選手）