Tabloids: Facts or Lies?

Tabloids: Facts or Lies? 小報：事實還是謊言？

Tuesday星期二

美發

Today Mom said I was looking“shaggy”, so she told me she was taking me to get a haircut.

今天老媽說我看起來“蓬頭垢臉”，她要帶我去剪頭發。

But I never would've agreed to get my hair cut if I knew that Mom was taking me to Bombshells Beauty Salon, which is where Mom and Gramma get THEIR hair cut.

要是我知道老媽帶我去的地方是她和外婆經常光顧的“麗人美發店”，打死我也不跟她到那兒去剪頭發。

I have to say, though, the whole beauty salon experience wasn't that bad.First of all, they have TVs all over the place, so you can watch a show while you're waiting to get your hair cut.

不過我得說，這次去美發店倒不太糟糕。首先，那兒到處都有電視機，可以一邊等發型師一邊看節目。

Second, they have lots oftabloids, those newspapers you see in thecheckoutlines atgrocerystores. Mom says tabloids are full of lies, but I think there's some really importantstuffin those things.

其次，那兒有很多小報，就是那些人們在超市一邊排隊等候結賬一邊看的報紙。老媽說小報充斥著謊言，可我覺得小報上確實有些重要的東西。

Key points

shaggy 毛發蓬松的 tabloid 小報 checkout 結賬 grocery 食品雜貨店 stuff 材料；資料

Gramma is always buying tabloids,even though Mom doesn'tapprove.A few weeks ago Gramma wasn't answering her phone, so Mom got worried and drove over to Gramma's to see if she was OK. Gramma was fine, but she wasn't picking up her phone because of something she read.

盡管老媽不喜歡小報，但外婆還是經常買。幾個星期前外婆好幾天不接電話，老媽心急火燎地開車去外婆家，卻發現她好得很。她不接電話全因她讀到的一段新聞。

無繩電話會損害老年人的記憶力。

But when Mom asked Gramma where she got her information, Gramma said —

老媽問外婆，她是怎么知道這條信息的，外婆說：

呃……《紐約時報》。

Whenever Mom fi nds any tabloids at Gramma's house, she takes them home and throws them in thegarbage. Last week I fi shed one out of thetrashand read it in my bedroom.

只要老媽在外婆家發現小報的蹤影，馬上就會把報紙帶回家，扔進垃圾桶。上周我在垃圾桶里翻到一張小報，偷偷拿回房里看。

I'm glad I did. I found out that North America will be underwater within six months, so that kind of takes thepressureoff me to do well in school.

我很慶幸自己讀了這張小報。報上說北美大陸6個月后就會被水淹沒，這樣一來我就沒必要在學校里好好學習了。

Key points

approve 贊成 garbage 垃圾 trash 垃圾 pressure 壓力

Horrible Midnight 恐怖午夜

Friday星期五

Wedugaround, and then we found ahorrormovie at the bottom of Rodrick'sdrawer.

I couldn't believe our luck. Neither one of us had actually seen a horror movie before,so this was a really big fi nd.

我們四處翻箱倒柜，在羅德里克的抽屜里找到一盤恐怖電影的光碟。我們的運氣好得令人難以置信。我和羅利誰也沒看過恐怖電影，這算得上是大收獲了。

喂，你死定了。

I asked Mom if Rowley could spend the night, and she said yes. I made sure I asked Mom when Dad was out of the room,because Dad doesn't like it when I havesleepoverson a "work night".

我問老媽羅利能不能在我們家留宿，她說沒問題。我特意等老爸不在房間的時候才去問老媽，他不喜歡我在“工作日的晚上”留同學在我們家過夜。

Last summer Rowley spent the night at my house, and we slept in thebasement.

去年暑假羅利也在我們家留宿過，我們一起睡地下室。

Key points

dug 尋找 horror 恐怖、可怕的事物 drawer 抽屜

sleepover 孩子到別的小朋友家過夜 basement 地下室

I made sure Rowley took the bed that was closest to thefurnaceroom, because that room really freaks me out. Ifi guredif anything came out of there in the middle of the night, it wouldgrabRowley fi rst and I'd have a fi ve-second head start toescape.

我讓羅利在正對鍋爐房的床上睡，因為我特別害怕那房間。萬一三更半夜鬼魂從那兒飄出來，它會先抓住羅利，我就多了5秒鐘的時間逃跑。

At about 1:00 in the morning, we heard something in the furnace room thatscaredthe living daylights out of us.

凌晨1點左右，我們聽見鍋爐房里有些動靜，嚇得魂飛魄散。

It sounded like a little ghost girl or something, and it said —

那聲音聽起來像一個年幼的女鬼，它說：

我藏起來了……你找得到我嗎？

Me and Rowley practicallytrampledeach other to death trying to get up the basement stairs.

我和羅利沒命地沖上樓梯，幾乎沒把對方給踩死。

Weburst intoMom and Dad's room, and I told them our house washauntedand we had to move immediately.

我們沖進老爸老媽的房間，我跟他們說我們的房子有鬼，必須馬上搬家。

To be continued

未完待續

Key points

furnace 火爐 fi gure 估計，認為 grab 抓住 escape 逃脫 scare 使害怕

trample 重重地踩 burst into 闖入 haunted 鬧鬼的