Cultural Wedding Gift Traditions

By Dana Holmes

One of the occasions where you don’t want to get someone’s cultural traditions wrong is their wedding day.So, what do you get the happy couple for their Jewish, Hindu, Buddhist,Catholic, or Muslim wedding? Of course, it’s always fine to get something off of the happy couple’s registry1registry 禮品愿望清單。列禮品愿望清單是西方婚禮獨有的做法，新郎新娘在結婚之前想清楚婚后家里需要添置的東西，選擇某一個（或幾個）商場，登記好自己的愿望清單，送禮人可到網站上查詢新人列出的禮品愿望清單來選禮物，還可以通過清單來查看某些物品是否已經被其他婚禮嘉賓購買。. If they registered for it, all rules go out the window. But, if you want to go the traditional route and know that the couple is religious, I’ve put together a list of some customs, dos, and don’ts for the major traditions out there.

Jewish

[2] There are three major denominations in Judaism: Orthodox, Conservative,and Reform, and numerous small denominations, as well, but lucky for you, most Jewish wedding traditions are consistent among the denominations. One gift that’s common at a Jewish wedding is money, but not just any money—money in multiples of the number 18, which is the numerical equivalent to the Hebrew word chai (pronounced “hai” with the “h”as a sort of gurgle2gurgle咯咯地發出（聲響）。in the back of your throat). Chai means “life” in English.Depending on your relationship to the couple at hand, you might want to give$144, which is eight times chai, or 11 times chai, which is $198, or any other variation you feel comfortable with.If you’re not feeling a monetary gift,try a mezuzah3mezuzah（猶太教）門柱圣卷。. Mezuzahs are pieces of parchment containing a verse from the Torah4《舊約》前五卷。that are created by qualified scribes5scribe（印刷術發明之前的）抄書吏；能寫一筆好字的人。and often put in decorative cases for display in doorways. Some believe that every door in the home must have one, so you don’t have to feel bad if the couple gets several. You may even want to get the case engraved with the couple’s initials. A few more ideas are Shabbat6（猶太教）安息日。candlesticks (Shabbat candles are lit on Friday evenings to usher in the Jewish day of rest), a Seder plate to use for Passover7（圣經）逾越節。, and a set of kosher8kosher按猶太教食規清潔可食的食品。cookbooks for their new home.

沒有人希望在別人結婚時搞錯他們的文化習俗。那么，去參加一場宗教婚禮時，比如猶太教、印度教、佛教、天主教或者伊斯蘭教婚禮，什么可以作為賀禮送給那對甜蜜的新人呢？當然，從婚禮禮物訂購清單里選送賀禮總是不錯的選擇。如果新人登記了禮品愿望清單，那么一切規矩統統不重要了。但是，如果送禮時希望遵循傳統并確知新人信教，那么以下關于一些主要宗教婚禮傳統的風俗習慣和注意事項或可參考。

猶太教婚禮

[2]猶太教主要分為三大派系：正統派、保守派和改革派，此外還有眾多小派別，不過幸運的是，雖然派系不同，但大部分猶太婚禮的傳統都大同小異。參加猶太教婚禮最常送的就是禮金，但金額很有講究，通常是18的倍數。18在希伯來語中拼寫為chai（發音為hai，其中h是在喉嚨后部發出類似咯咯的聲音），在英語中是“生命”的意思。人們可以根據自己與新人的親疏遠近來決定是送144美元（chai的8倍）還是送198美元（chai的11倍），或者任何其他自己認為合適的數目。如果你不喜歡送禮金，那么可以選擇門柱圣卷。門柱圣卷由羊皮紙制成，經由資深的抄經人將《舊約》前五卷經文節選謄抄其上后，放在裝飾精美的盒子里，置于門廊處。有人認為家里的每道門都得裝門柱圣卷，所以即使這對新人已經收了很多個，你也無須為此而感到難堪。你可以選擇在盒子上刻上他們名字首字母的縮寫。此外，還可以為他們的新家送上安息日蠟燭臺（猶太教信徒會在星期五晚上點安息日蠟燭，表示即將進入猶太教的休息日）、逾越節用的逾越節餐盤以及潔食烹飪書。

Hindu

[3] Money is also a common gift ata Hindu wedding, and as with a Jewish wedding, there is a particular number theme in Hindu culture. Numbers ending in one are considered lucky,so it is best to give money in these denominations; for example, a gift of$101, $151 or $201. If you’d prefer to give something other than money,a great traditional gift is a small gold or silver religious statue. A statue of Hindu God Ganesha9迦內什，梵名毗那也迦，也稱“象鼻天”“障礙神”，印度神話中的智慧、財富之神。印度很多商鋪都供奉迦內什。, the lord of beginnings is a good idea, as is a statue of Lakshmi10拉克西米，毗濕奴神的正妻，是一位強有力的女神，掌管豐收和家庭。, the Goddess of prosperity,fortune and fertility. You might even try pairing the two statues together for the ultimate wedding gift. At a Hindu wedding, perhaps even more important than what you should get is what you shouldn’t get. Never give a gift made of leather! Hindus believe the skin of a dead animal, particularly a cow, to be sacrilegious11sacrilegious褻瀆的。.

Buddhist

[4] Giving money in denominations ending in one is also a Buddhist tradition for the same reason as in Hindu culture, and monetary gifts are believed to carry good luck. If you can find a traditional red envelope with gold and black lettering to tuck the money inside, even better. A statue is also a thoughtful gift for a Buddhist couple. A statue of Goddess Laxmi, the Goddess of prosperity would be well received.And you can never go wrong with the traditional Maitreya Buddha, who brings luck, or the Kwan Yin statue,which inspires compassion and peace in the home. One last idea for your Buddhist newlywed friends is a leatherbound Buddhist bible, perfect for their new beginning together.

印度教婚禮

[3]奉送禮金在印度教婚禮上也十分常見。跟猶太教婚禮一樣，印度教文化中也有特定的數字概念。印度教教徒將以1結尾的數字視為幸運數字，如101美元、151美元或者201美元等，所以奉送的禮金最好符合這條規矩。如果你更青睞其他方式，那么一尊金質或銀質神像將是一份不錯的傳統禮物。印度教象鼻神迦內什的雕像或者象征豐收、財富和生育的拉克西米女神的雕像都是上佳選擇。你甚至可以嘗試把這兩個神的雕像組成一對，那將是給新人的最好禮物。在印度教婚禮上，更需要關注的不是應該送什么，而是不應該送什么。需要謹記的是，千萬不要送皮革禮物！印度教教徒認為死去的動物的皮，尤其是牛的皮，是對神明的嚴重褻瀆。

佛教婚禮

[4]出于和印度教同樣的原因，佛教也有以1結尾的數字作為禮金數額的傳統，而且佛教徒們往往認為禮金能夠給新人們帶來好運。如果你能找到印有金字和黑字的傳統紅包來裝禮金，就更好了。對佛教徒夫妻而言，神像也不失為體貼的禮物。豐饒女神拉克西米的雕像必定大受歡迎，而選擇象征幸運的彌勒佛像或者象征慈悲與和氣的觀音像也一定不會錯。還有一樣適合送給佛教徒新婚夫婦的禮物，那就是皮革包邊的佛經，以此來祝福他們共同的新開始再好不過了。

Catholic

[5] For especially devout Catholics in particular, but for all Catholics,religious-based wedding gifts are quite popular. A crucifix is a great universal wedding gift. Crucifixes come in many different styles, so you can use this to your advantage and choose something reminiscent of the lucky couple. Or,made specifically for weddings are gold and silver crucifixes with two wedding bands on the front. It’d be hard to go wrong with that! A Bible is always an appropriate gift for a Catholic wedding,as well; you can even get a Bible inscribed with the couple’s names or initials and their wedding date, making it that much more special. Another great idea is a nativity set, which is a central element of Catholic Christmas décor,or a statue of Mary and rose plants so the new couple can plant both in their garden. If you aren’t yourself religious,it might feel weird to give a crucifix.In that case, a softer purchase of angel candle holders or etched12etched蝕刻的，鑿出花紋的。vases are a great option.

天主教婚禮

[5] 對于所有天主教教徒而言，有宗教意義的結婚禮物備受歡迎，對那些格外虔誠的教徒更是如此。耶穌受難十字架是十分常見的結婚好禮。這樣的十字架樣式繁多，因此，可以充分利用這一點好好挑選一款對這對幸運夫婦有紀念意義的十字架。或者也可以選擇鑲有對戒的特制的金十字架和銀十字架。這樣的禮物絕對不會出問題！《圣經》永遠是參加天主教婚禮的送禮上選；甚至可以送上一本題有這對夫妻名字或名字首字母縮寫以及婚禮日期的《圣經》，這會顯得十分特別。另一個不錯的選擇是一套“耶穌降生”裝飾，這是天主教圣誕節的主要元素。又或者是圣母馬利亞的雕像和玫瑰插枝，新婚夫婦可以把玫瑰種在自己的花園里，再用雕像來裝點。如果你本人不信教，送別人十字架可能會有些奇怪，大可輕松選購一些天使燭臺或者雕紋花瓶。

Muslim

[6] With a Muslim wedding, what not to get as a wedding gift is almost,if not more, important than what to get. Mainly, do not get gifts of alcohol or anything to do with alcohol; this includes champagne glasses, wine glass sets and 60-year-old aged whiskey as lovely as it might seem. Those following the Islamic religion refrain from drinking alcohol. A wedding gift“do,” however, that should be at the top of your list is Islamic artwork. This makes a great gift because it helps to tell the story of their religion. Another popular idea for an Islamic wedding gift is a customized name canvas of Islamic calligraphy. These are personalized with the names of the bride and groom,and meant to last a lifetime, like their marriage.

[7] Next time you get invited to a wedding of someone with a different cultural background than your own,hopefully this guide can be of assistance.Otherwise, start your research! Again,this is not the kind of thing you want to get wrong. Happy gifting! ■

穆斯林婚禮

[6]參加穆斯林的婚禮，結婚禮物的忌諱更值得我們關注，其重要性絕不亞于要送什么。大體上而言，酒水或者跟酒有關的任何東西都不能作為禮物，其中包括香檳杯、酒杯套裝以及60年的威士忌等，盡管60年的威士忌看起來或許很棒，這是因為信奉伊斯蘭教的人禁酒。至于可送的結婚禮物，首選伊斯蘭教的藝術品。這些藝術品之所以成為送禮佳選是因為它們能彰顯這對夫妻的宗教信仰。另一件流行的禮物便是定制的伊斯蘭書法帆布條幅，上面署上新郎、新娘的名字，象征兩人的婚姻長長久久。

[7]希望下次受邀參加文化背景不同的親友的婚禮時，這些建議能對大家有所幫助。或者，自己好好做做功課！再次強調，這種事你一定不想出岔子。祝你禮物挑得開心！ □