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時候擺脫這些軟件了

2016-11-17 05:09:25BellaMackie譯JeanBee迷失嘟嘟
意林(繪英語) 2016年6期

文Bella Mackie譯JeanBee 繪迷失嘟嘟

時候擺脫這些軟件了

I Need to Escape from the Plenty of the Apps

文Bella Mackie譯JeanBee 繪迷失嘟嘟

My phone buzzes①buzz 英 [b?z] 美 [b?z] vt. 使嗡嗡叫;暗中散布 vi. 作嗡嗡聲;東奔西忙 n. 嗡嗡聲a lot. It lights up and grabs my attention during meetings, when I'm falling asleep and when I'm walking the dog.

For the most part, I emphatically declined their pleas②plea英 [pli?] 美 [pli] n. 懇求,請求;辯解,辯護;借口,托辭to send me push notifications③notification 英 [,n??t?f?'ke??n] 美 ['not?f?'ke??n] n. 通知;通告;[法] 告示, or know my location. I was smart, I wouldn't let these apps be the boss of me. And yet, the alerts come,day and night. In the past week,I received a passive-aggressive message from the language app telling me that it would no longer bother telling me I haven't been practising my Italian, since it obviously wasn't working. Then there was a mournful④mournful 英 ['m??nf?l; -f(?)l] 美 ['m?rnfl] adj. 悲哀的;令人惋惜的message that arrived during a meeting

from the running one, which genuinely said: "If you're working out with someone else, it's OK,just log it with us too", which made me feel like I was being unfaithful, instead of just running in the gym most days.

Even the programmes already installed⑤install 美 [?n'st?l] vt. 安裝;任命;安頓on your phone don't let you be. If you have an iPhone,you'll have a health app. It tells you how many steps you've walked a day. I am now locked in a competitive walking ritual with myself. Under 10,000? My muscles will atrophy⑥atrophy 英 ['?tr?f?] 美 ['?tr?fi] n. 萎縮,萎縮癥;發育停止 vi. 萎縮;虛脫!

The problem with these programs, (and, yes, I'm aware that I use the word "problem" lightly — world news is over there) is that they rarely make you feel fantastic about yourself. For every run that your fitness app gives you a virtual high five for, there will be many other occasions when you haven't worked out and you'll see that little widget⑦widget 英 ['w?d??t] 美 ['w?d??t] n. 裝飾物;小機械;小部件;未定名的主要新產品glinting at you, reminding you of your failure. You might've been ill, or depressed, or busy working on a brilliant new project — the app doesn't care.

Modern technology helps us in so many incredible ways that it would be churlish⑧churlish 英 ['t???l??] adj. 沒有禮貌的;脾氣暴躁的to complain too severely about apps that can enhance or simplify our lives. But perhaps the companies that design them should have a think about how they want to make us feel. Nagging guilt trips and passive-aggressive notifications are not conventional sales techniques. From now on, I'll be more cautious when I download these little widgets. My success or failure in finding true love,or finally learning how to do a handstand might well be helped along by my smartphone, but none of us should measure our progress in life by it. If I really want to feel guilty, I can always phone my mother.

我的手機經常在響。無論我是在開會,還是躺在床上,或是正在遛狗,手機只要一閃,就吸引了我的注意力。

更多時候,我斷然拒絕了應用程序“推送消息”和“獲得位置”的請求。聰明如我,我才不會讓這些應用程序對我指手畫腳呢。然而,手機消息還是沒日沒夜地飛來了。就在上周,我的語言應用發送了一條消極激進的信息,說它以后不會再費心提醒我,我還沒有練習意大利語了,反正說了也沒用。在我開會的時候,我的跑步應用也發了一條悲傷的消息,它誠摯地告訴我:“如果你找到鍛煉的伙伴了,不用擔心這會傷害到我。但是記得讓你的伙伴加入我們哦。”這條消息并沒有刺激我花時間去健身房跑步,但讓我感覺自己是個叛徒。

手機配套應用也不會放過你的。如果你買了個iphone,你就會有一個健康應用程序。這個應用會告訴你一天走了多少步。我如今在一個自我步行競賽中困住了,如果每天走路少于1萬步?我的肌肉可是會萎縮的!

這些應用的問題在于,它們很難讓你對自己產生良好評價(我意識到我很少使用“問題”這個詞,畢竟世界新聞擺在那里)。雖然每次跑步你的手機應用會給你一個虛擬的擊掌(以示慶祝),但大多數時候,你沒有在運動,這個應用讓手機閃光、提醒你:你失敗了。你可能生病了,或者情緒低落,更有可能是在忙碌于一個不錯的新計劃——然而這些都不是健康應用所關心的。

現代科技以很多出其不意的方式幫助我們。如果過多地抱怨這些可以提高或者簡化我們生活的應用程序,可就不禮貌了。不過也許設計這些應用的公司應該想想,我們對這些應用的感覺如何。擾人的、讓人感覺內疚的使用體驗,以及消極激進的提醒信息,可不是符合用戶習慣的銷售技巧。從現在開始,我會更加謹慎地下載這些小東西。我的智能手機也許會幫助我成功找到真愛、學會做倒立,不過任何人都不應該用手機來測量生活的進程。如果我確實想要內疚一下,打個電話給我媽就行了。

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