和尚鸚鵡，偷心的俠盜王子

Quakers， Prince of Thieves

uaker parrots are thieves！ They try to steal your Hershey Kisses， and before you know it， they have stolen your heart instead.

My husband and I sat down to what we thought was 1）mundane TV for the evening. But little did we know， we would receive a spark that would change our lives forever. We were watching PBS as they were explaining the finer points of owning parrots. They were all so fascinating， I squealed with delight. My husband took notice.

It was two days before Christmas of 1998. My husband brought in a large package. I opened it. I said， “Why...it’s a bird cage，” incredulously. I took all the paper off. My stepson Bob handed me a little brown box that was gently in motion！ The tears are coming to my eyes even now as I remember the scene. I opened the box and the cutest little green bird you’d ever seen sweetly said， “Step up？” And he came out quickly onto my hand and ran up my sleeve！ My life has never been the same since. We named him Patrick O’Brien because he looked Irish and after all， he was green.

Once everything was in place and he was safely in his cage with food and water and toys， he was not in any particular mood to be friendly. I could hear 2）Paddy talking to himself， “Pretty bird？ Are you talking to me？” I decided to just give him a little time. But I decided that I have to assert myself and be the boss.

After Christmas， I got Paddy out of his cage and placed him on a little swing. There were times when I was boiling water or cooking， that I didn’t want Paddy in the kitchen. Then Paddy would give out the most 3）bloodcurdling 4）squawk！ I let out a loud squawk and wondered what would happen. After a while， Paddy began to try to imitate my squawk. It was hilarious. So now， when he is too loud， I’ll just squawk and then he will imitate me and it will be a softer aakk. After all， he doesn’t want to make loud noises. He just wants my attention. Sometimes he starts with his wolf whistle. I just whistle back and he is happy to know I’m still in the house.

Quakers are such 5）inquisitive little creatures. Paddy loves to sing along with Lawrence Welk and flips his little wings to the music and sways. He learned to say “pretty bird” and peek a boo. He also learned to say “good bird”.

Once while in the bathroom， Paddy fell into the wastebasket full of 6）Kleenex. I picked him up immediately and he said， “Thank you！” He never learned that from me. But he knows when to say “thank you”.

One day we were on our way to the sink for our bath and Paddy decided he didn’t want a bath. He flew clear through the house and into the piano room. I chased him all the way. As he was 7）breezing past my husband’s head， he said， “Maybe it’s time to have his wings clipped.” So his yearly checkup came early that first year and we had his wings clipped.

When I got Paddy home， he sat on his cage and would not speak. Birds need a few days to 8）pout. They can’t fly and their toenails have been 9）filed so they can’t hold on good. They are upset. Not to worry. In a few days， they will be back to normal.

Paddy is a party bird！ He loves to mingle among the guests！ He wows the crowd with his usual verbal fare The second Christmas here was in 2000. I was yelling for everyone to “come in”. By the time the very last guest had come， Paddy ran across his cage and yelled， “Come in！”One day my husband wanted a cup of coffee. He told Paddy to say “Phyllis， come here”. From then on， he turned “come in” into “come here”. After a few weeks， my husband started adding， “Phyllis， come here， drink， drink.” So， somehow， after a period of time， we started having decaf at 5pm every day. （Paddy would always know when it was 5pm！） He would start saying “drink， drink”. Husbands are a bad influence！

My day starts something like this： “Phyllis， Phyllis， sweetheart， come here， come here！” If I don’t drag myself out of bed， Paddy climbs down to the floor and walks into the bedroom and crawls up the blanket， gets on my shoulder and says “Good morning” right in my ear！

Paddy usually goes to bed early. When Paddy is ready to go to his hut， he walks up to my chin and bumps it. I say， “You wanna go nitenite？” He says， “Good night！” So I take him over so he can say goodnight to my husband. Then I say goodnight and he goes into his hut. Then he says“gimme a kiss” and I do and turn off most of the lights.

But if we have gone out for dinner， Paddy will be on the top of his cage when we get back ready for a handout. And it 10）behooves me to make sure I have brought something home！ There’ll be the devil to pay if I didn’t！

Holidays are a nightmare （not really）. It’s just that Paddy can’t seem to understand why the kids get all the candy and he can’t have any！ He tries to run down my sleeve and steal a piece. He loves to sit on my shoulder at Halloween and have the kids reach in the bowl for the candy. They say “Is that a real bird？” and Paddy says “Goodbye！” When anyone says“I’ve got to go”， Paddy says “Goodbye！” He is hilarious. This year after Christmas， Paddy and I gave our 11）rendition of We Wish You a Merry Christmas. I sang “Weeee...wish you a Merry...” Then I paused and Paddy sang “Christmas”. He did that 3 times and then I sang “and a happy new year”. We were a hit！

So， as you can see， my life Pre-bird was almost a 12）breeze， but it wasn’t nearly as rewarding. Now even my husband talks gentler to me after spending years talking gentle to this loving little creature. You get a whole new perspective on life after having known a Quaker， the Prince of Thieves.

和尚鸚鵡都是小偷！它們企圖偷走你的好時巧克力，不知不覺地，還偷走了你的心。

我和丈夫坐下來看再平常不過的晚間檔電視節目。但當時我們都沒想到，我們會由此產生一個永久地改變我們生活的念頭。我們在收看美國公共電視臺，節目在講養鸚鵡的好處。電視上的鸚鵡看起來都那么迷人，我歡快地尖叫起來。我丈夫注意到了。

1998年圣誕節的前兩天，我丈夫帶回一個大包裹。我打開它，不解地說：“怎么……是一只鳥籠。”我把包裝紙都拆掉了。我的繼子遞給我一個在微微晃動的棕色小盒子！即使到了現在，我想起來當時的情景，眼睛也會濕潤。我打開了盒子，我所見過最可愛的一只小綠鳥兒甜甜地說：“走近一點？”然后它快速地走到我的手上，跳到了我的袖子上！自那以后我的生活就再也不同于以往了。我們給它起名為帕特里克·奧布萊恩，畢竟它是綠色的，看起來像愛爾蘭裔。

所有東西都布置妥當后，它安然地在自己的籠子里，籠子里有食物，有水，有玩具，但它卻完全沒有想表現友好的意思。我聽到帕迪在自言自語道：“美鳥兒？你在和我說話嗎？”我決定給它一點時間。但我又決定擺出姿態，宣示權威。

圣誕節后，我把帕迪從籠子里放出來，把它安置在一個小秋千上。有時候我在煮開水或者做飯，就不想讓帕迪進廚房。然后帕迪就會發出最令人毛骨悚然的粗厲叫聲！我也大聲地尖叫一下看它會有什么反應。過了一會兒，帕迪開始試著模仿我的尖叫。