關(guān)于美的事實(shí)和真相

Dear girls，

Youre so young right now. Im planning on being around for you well into your lives and adulthood， but even so， who knows how things might change down the road， and at least youll have your 34-year-old mothers thoughts down on paper.

Anyway， I want this letter to be about beauty and my relationship to it. I feel this enormous responsibility， as a mother of two little girls， to lead you down a path that is relatively healthy when it comes to beauty and self-image.

I played with Barbie for a solid decade when I was growing up and here I am now at a healthy weight with a healthy outlook about my body and image. I have a masters degree and have a successful career and a published book. If Barbie were really so damaging to my femininity and self-image， I highly doubt I could list all of the latter as accomplishments.

But I get it too. Its hard for women to maintain a healthy self-image. Its hard not to obsess over our weight and to wish we could afford more stylish clothes. Its hard not to covet someone elses hair or eyelashes， and to spend inordinate amounts of time trying to achieve looks that we were never suited for in the first place.

I have girlfriends around. Even though I love them， just being around them makes me self-conscious. I look at old pictures of my mother and wonder why Ive never been able to be as skinny as she was. We women go round and round in circles， holding hands and trying to be one another sometimes.

Men like to think we dress and style ourselves for them， but why would we when they hardly notice？ Ive never tried so hard to look good as when I know Im about to meet up with a stylish girlfriend. Its she who will notice my slimmed down waist or the thinnest， little bracelet on my arm.

And I have no doubt that the two of you， Veronica and Juliette， will endlessly compare yourselves to each other. You will wonder why one of you get longer legs or shinier hair or thicker eyelashes. The thing Ill tell you， the thing to remember is this： not even the prettiest of us feel settled. The girl you think looks the most perfect in all the world is probably the girl who wants to change herself more than anyone else.

Dont take these on. Dont let that message carry any weight within yourselves. You are not worthless. You are so full of love and light and you should let it shine through you every second of every day. If someone pushes you down for standing tall then just push yourself back up and stand even taller. I will tell you that I have never in my life felt more beautiful than when I have stood my tallest.

Stand tall.

Love，

Mom

我親愛的女兒們：

你們現(xiàn)在如此稚嫩。我計(jì)劃著一路陪伴你們長(zhǎng)大成人，即便如此，誰(shuí)也不知道將來(lái)會(huì)發(fā)生什么，但至少你們會(huì)有我這個(gè)34歲的母親寫下的想法供你們參考。

不管怎樣，我想在這封信里談?wù)勱P(guān)于美以及我對(duì)美的看法。作為一個(gè)有兩個(gè)女兒的母親，我有重大的責(zé)任把你們導(dǎo)向相對(duì)健康的對(duì)美和自我形象的認(rèn)識(shí)之路。

我小時(shí)候玩了整整十年的芭比娃娃，現(xiàn)在我有標(biāo)準(zhǔn)的體重，對(duì)體型和外貌有正確的認(rèn)識(shí)，獲得了碩士學(xué)位，事業(yè)成功，還出版了一本書。如果芭比娃娃真的對(duì)我的女性特質(zhì)和個(gè)人形象有不良的影響，那我真是非常懷疑我列出的以上成就是怎么來(lái)的。

但是，我也知道，對(duì)女人來(lái)說(shuō)，有正確的自我形象觀很不容易。想要不被增加的體重困擾，能不奢求有錢買更多時(shí)髦的衣服，這真的很難；想要不覬覦別的女生的時(shí)尚發(fā)型和濃密睫毛，能克制自己不在身上花過(guò)多的時(shí)間打造完全不適合自己的造型，這些也都太難了。

我身邊有一群女性朋友，雖然我很愛她們，但和她們待在一起我會(huì)覺得不自然。看著我媽媽的老照片，我總是納悶為什么我永遠(yuǎn)不能像她那么骨感。我們女人總在轉(zhuǎn)圈圈，有時(shí)還牽著彼此的手試著成為對(duì)方。

男人習(xí)慣性地認(rèn)為我們穿衣打扮是為了給他們看，但為什么當(dāng)他們幾乎注意不到這些時(shí)，我們依然樂(lè)此不疲呢？當(dāng)我知道馬上要見一個(gè)時(shí)髦的女性朋友時(shí)，我就會(huì)費(fèi)盡心思地打扮自己，讓自己看起來(lái)容光煥發(fā)。而她也肯定會(huì)注意到我苗條的腰線和手臂上纖細(xì)精巧的手鐲。

毫無(wú)疑問(wèn)，維羅妮卡和朱麗葉，你們以后也會(huì)無(wú)止境地相互比較。你們會(huì)郁悶為什么對(duì)方的腿比自己的長(zhǎng)，頭發(fā)比自己的有光澤或者睫毛比自己的濃密。我要告訴你們并請(qǐng)你們牢記：即使是最漂亮的女人也沒有安全感，你眼里最完美的女孩或許比任何人都想改變自己。

不要太在乎這些外在的差異，不要讓這些訊息成為你的思想負(fù)擔(dān)。你有自己獨(dú)特的價(jià)值。你的生命中充滿愛和光芒，讓它們每一天的每分每秒都照耀你的生活吧！如果有人為了站得高一點(diǎn)而把你推倒，那么你得堅(jiān)強(qiáng)地站起來(lái)，讓自己站得更高！而我要告訴你們的是，當(dāng)我站在人生最高處的時(shí)候，我覺得那是我最美麗的時(shí)刻！

昂首挺立。

愛你們的媽媽endprint