我的信念

Troy+Chapman

hen the scruffy orange cat showed up in the prison yard, I was one of the first to go out there and pet it. I hadnt touched a cat or a dog in over 20 years. It was an amazing bit of grace to feel him under my hand and know that I was enriching the life of another creature with something as simple as my care. I believe that caring for someone or something in need is what makes us human.

Over the next few days, I watched other prisoners responding to the cat. Every yard period, a group of prisoners gathered there. They stood around talking and taking turns petting the cat. These were guys you wouldnt usually find talking to each other. Several times I saw an officer in the group—not chasing people away, but just watching and seeming to enjoy it along with the prisoners.

Bowls of milk and water appeared, along with bread. The cat was obviously a stray and in pretty bad shape. One prisoner brought out his small, blunt-tipped scissors, and trimmed burrs and matted fur from his coat.

People said, “That cat came to the right place. Hes getting treated like a king.” This was true. But as I watched, I was also thinking about what the cat was doing for us.

Theres a lot of talk about whats wrong with prisons in America. We need more programs; we need more psychologists or treatment of various kinds. But I think what we really need is a chance to practice kindness ourselves. Not receive it, but give it.

After more than two decades here, I know that kindness is not a value thats encouraged. Instead, the culture encourages keeping your head down and minding your own business.

For a few days, a ragged cat disrupted this code of prison culture. Theyve taken him away now—hopefully to a decent home—but it did my heart good to see the effect he had on me and the men here. He didnt have a Ph.D., he wasnt a criminologist or a psychologist, but by simply saying, “I need some help here”, he did something important for us. He needed us, and we need to be needed. I believe we all do.

那只臟兮兮的橘黃色小貓出現在監獄的院子里時，我是第一批走上前去撫摸它的人之一。我已經有二十多年未曾摸過一只貓或狗了。感覺到它在我的手掌下，知道自己只不過用一絲簡單的關心就讓另一個生命的日子變得充實起來，這真是一種令人驚嘆的恩典。我相信，對有需要的人或物表示關心，是我們作為人所應有的特質。

在接下來的幾天里，我看到其他犯人紛紛對這只貓表示關注。每次放風的時候，總有一群犯人圍在那里。他們站在那里聊天，輪流撫摸著貓兒。平時，你不會看到這些家伙彼此交談。還有幾次，我看見一位獄警也站在人群里——不是為了把人們趕開，而是就在那里看著，似乎和犯人一起享受著這難得的時光。

有人放下幾碗牛奶和清水，還有面包。這顯然是一只流浪貓，健康狀況相當糟糕。一名犯人拿出他的鈍頭小剪刀，給它修剪身上的芒刺和糾纏的毛團。

大家都說：“這只貓來對地方了。我們把它當國王一般款待。”確實如此。不過當我看著人與貓的互動，我也在思考這只貓為我們帶來了什么。

許多人在討論美國監獄到底出了什么問題。我們需要更多（改造）項目，我們需要更多心理學家或各種治療法。但我認為，我們真正需要的是一個讓我們表現善意的機會，不是接受，而是給予。

在這里呆了二十多年后，我知道監獄并不鼓勵善意善行。相反，這里提倡的監獄文化是低調做人，別管閑事。

在那幾天，一只邋遢的小貓打亂了這種監獄文化的法則。現在他們把它抱走了——很可能送到某個靠譜的家庭，但是看到它對我以及這里的人所產生的影響，我的心靈得到了救贖。它并沒有博士學位，也不是犯罪學家或心理學家。它只不過簡單地說了一句“我需要幫助”，就為我們帶來了非常重要的影響。它需要我們，而我們也渴望被人需要。我相信人皆如此。

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