多莉姨媽的帽子

By+Anonymous

Three things I was sure of as a child： My family loved me. Thesunwouldcomeuptomorrow.Ihadawonderfulvoice.

I figured that was unquestionably true because I participated at the top of my lungs in all the family sing-alongs， and no one ever stopped me. So I was delighted when my second-gradeteacherSisterKathleenannouncedherplansfor a musical pageant at Christmas. She said she would cast singers accordingtoability.

It was my turn. Sister played， and I sang with all the emotion a seven-year-old child could master.“Thank you， Jacquelyn，”Sister said， interrupting.“Next， please.”Id barely sung a dozen lines. Some of the kids snickered as I returned to myseat.WhathadIdonewrong？

One by one the solo roles were filled. While the other childrenstudiedtheirmusic，SisterKathleen motioned metoher desk.Shelookedkindlyatme.

“Jacquelyn，haveyouheardtheexpressiontone-deaf？”Ishookmyhead.

“It means what you think you are singing is different from the music.”Sister patted my hand.“Its nothing to be ashamed of， dear. You will still be in the pageant. You will be a lip-syncher. You may mouth the words， but no sound must be uttered.DoyouunderstandwhatImsaying？”

I understood， all right. I was so ashamed， and I didnt go home after school. I took the bus straight to Aunt Dollys house. Shehadananswerforeverything.

Independently single in an era when most women wed， shed gone on safari， shaken hands with President Eisenhower， kissed Clark Gable on the cheek， and planned to visit every country in the world. More than anyone else， she would understand that my world had been turned upside down by this terriblerevelation.

AuntDollyservedmecookiesand milk.“WhatwillI do？”I sobbed.“IfIdontsing，GodwillthinkIdontlovehim.”

Aunt Dolly drummed her fingers on the table as her brow creased in thought. Finally her eyes grew wide.“Ive got it！”she said.“Iwillwearmyhat！”

Her hat？ How can a hat help me with being tone-deaf？ Aunt Dolly leveled her brown eyes on my face. Her voice dropped.“Jacquelyn， Im about to reveal a bit of secret information about angels， but first you must swear that you will nevertellasoul.”

“Iswear，”Iwhispered.

Aunt Dolly took my hand in hers.“When I was in Rome， prayingin St. Peters，”she said，“I overheard a conversation in the next pew. It seems that other tone-deaf people also have concerns about God not understanding their silence in song. They were told， in the strictest confidence， of course， that a simplepieceofaluminumfoilistheanswer.”endprint

“Idontunderstand.”

“You mouth the words，”she said.“Your silent words reflect off the foil. Angels capture the words and put them in specialpouchestheycarryuptoGod.”

“WherewillIhidethefoil？”

“My hat！”said Aunt Dolly.“Ill hide it in my hat. Ill sit in the front row. As for Sister Kathleen and your parents？ Not a singlewordtothem.”

My entire family attended the pageant. I gave what Aunt Dolly called“an Oscar-winning performance”. With my eyes firmly on her hat， the fact that none present could hear my voice didntmatter.MysilentsingingwasforGodsearsalone.

Four years ago Aunt Dolly died at the age of 90. When the nieces and nephews gathered to reminisce about her， we discoveredsomethingmanyofushadincommon，herangelichat.

A stutterer made it through a dreaded speech by concentrating on the hat. Even the most timid of us took part in schoolplays， spellingbeesand talentshows， becauseAunt Dolly satinthefrontrowwearingherhat.

Her surefire faith that Gods angels are here to help us overcome lifes stumbling blocks enabled us kids to do things wethoughtwereimpossible.

Even now at times， when my world is turned upside down， I think ofAuntDollyand remember thatmychildhood beliefsstill hold true. My family loves me. The sun will come up tomorrow. And for one unforgettable Christmas pageant， I had a wonderful voice.

當(dāng)我還是小孩子時(shí)，我曾對(duì)三件事情篤信不疑：我的家人都愛(ài)我，太陽(yáng)每天早上都會(huì)升起，我的嗓音很美妙。

對(duì)最后一點(diǎn)我尤其有把握，因?yàn)槊慨?dāng)全家一起唱歌時(shí)，我都會(huì)扯著嗓門(mén)大喊，從來(lái)沒(méi)有人阻止過(guò)我。所以當(dāng)我的二年級(jí)老師凱瑟琳嬤嬤宣布她要為在圣誕節(jié)當(dāng)天舉行的一場(chǎng)演唱會(huì)挑選歌手時(shí)，我別提有多高興了。她說(shuō)，要根據(jù)能力挑選歌手。

輪到我了，嬤嬤開(kāi)始彈琴，我則以一個(gè)七歲女孩兒所能展示的最豐富的感情開(kāi)始演唱。可沒(méi)唱幾句就被嬤嬤打斷了：“謝謝你，杰奎琳，下一位。”當(dāng)我回到座位上時(shí)，看到有些同學(xué)在竊笑。難道我做錯(cuò)什么事了嗎？

獨(dú)唱的名額全部招滿了。當(dāng)其他同學(xué)開(kāi)始熟悉音樂(lè)時(shí)，嬤嬤把我叫到她的桌前，溫和地看著我。

“杰奎琳，你聽(tīng)說(shuō)過(guò)‘音盲這個(gè)詞嗎？”我搖了搖頭。

“就是說(shuō)你唱出來(lái)的聲音與樂(lè)曲不一樣。”她拍拍我的手說(shuō)，“這沒(méi)什么值得害羞的，親愛(ài)的，你仍然可以參加合唱隊(duì)。在演唱時(shí)，你做出發(fā)音的口型就可以了，但不要發(fā)聲。你明白我的意思嗎？”

我明白。我是如此羞愧，以至于放學(xué)后我沒(méi)有回家，而是直接坐公共汽車來(lái)到多莉姨媽家。在我眼里，沒(méi)有什么事情能夠難得倒她。

在那個(gè)大多數(shù)女性都要嫁人的年代里，她勇敢地選擇獨(dú)身生活。她還參加過(guò)狩獵遠(yuǎn)征隊(duì)，和艾森豪威爾總統(tǒng)握過(guò)手，吻過(guò)克拉克·蓋博（好萊塢著名男影星）的臉，并打算環(huán)游世界。我想她比任何人都能理解我的世界是如何被這個(gè)可怕的發(fā)現(xiàn)搞得翻了天。

多莉姨媽給我端來(lái)餅干和牛奶。“我該怎么辦？”我抽泣著說(shuō)，“如果我不能唱歌，上帝會(huì)以為我不愛(ài)他的。”

多莉姨媽的手指在桌上敲著，眉頭皺在一起，最后她眼睛一亮：“有辦法了！我將帽子戴上！”

她的帽子？它能幫我解決“音盲”這個(gè)問(wèn)題嗎？她那棕色的眼睛盯著我，聲音忽然降了下來(lái)：“杰奎琳，我將透露一點(diǎn)兒天使的秘密，但首先你得發(fā)誓不會(huì)告訴任何人。”

“我發(fā)誓。”我低聲說(shuō)。

多莉姨媽抓著我的手說(shuō)：“當(dāng)我在羅馬的圣彼得教堂祈禱時(shí)，我曾聽(tīng)到旁邊座位上的一段對(duì)話。似乎其他音盲，也擔(dān)心上帝聽(tīng)不到他們的歌聲。那里的牧師悄悄告訴他們，一小塊鋁箔就可以解決這個(gè)問(wèn)題。”

“我不明白。”

“你在嘴里默默地念出歌詞，它們會(huì)通過(guò)鋁箔反射，天使就能捕捉到這些歌詞，把它們放到特制的袋子里，然后送給上帝。”

“那我把鋁箔藏在哪兒呢？”

“藏在我的帽子里。”多莉姨媽說(shuō)，“我會(huì)坐在演唱會(huì)的前排。不要對(duì)凱瑟琳嬤嬤和你的父母泄漏一個(gè)字。”

圣誕節(jié)那天，全家都去觀看我的表演。我緊緊盯著多莉姨媽的帽子，根本不在乎在場(chǎng)的人能否聽(tīng)到我的聲音，我沉默的歌聲是唱給上帝一個(gè)人聽(tīng)的。演出非常成功，多莉姨媽夸我的表演具有“奧斯卡水準(zhǔn)”。

四年前多莉姨媽去世了，享年90歲。當(dāng)我們晚輩聚在一起，追憶她時(shí)，我們吃驚地發(fā)現(xiàn)，她的“天使帽子”曾幫過(guò)我們?cè)S多人。

一個(gè)口吃的孩子盯著她的帽子，完成了一次可怕的演講。就連我們當(dāng)中最膽小的那個(gè)也參加了學(xué)校的戲劇演出、拼寫(xiě)比賽和達(dá)人秀，就因?yàn)槎嗬蛞虌尨髦弊幼谇芭拧?/p>

她讓我們相信天使就在我們身邊幫我們戰(zhàn)勝生活中的困難，讓我們完成了許多自以為不可能完成的任務(wù)。

即使到了現(xiàn)在，當(dāng)我在生活中遇到挫折時(shí)，我還會(huì)想起多莉姨媽。我童年時(shí)的信仰仍然沒(méi)有改變：我的家人都愛(ài)我；太陽(yáng)每天早上都會(huì)升起；在那個(gè)難忘的圣誕節(jié)表演中，我擁有美妙的聲音。endprint